Most people pleasers believe that they’re kind and generous, that they care about others, but what if I was to tell you that most of what you’re doing is actually coming from a place of fear. People pleasing isn’t about helping others, or making other people happy. It’s about controlling how you’re perceived so that you can avoid conflict, rejection, and being judged, and the cost of this particular strategy is enormous. You resent everybody, you lose track of who you are, and you create a life that’s ultimately quite miserable and uncomfortable. So today we’re going to cover the core lie behind people pleasing: the idea that you are making other people happy. We’re going to attack this lie so that we can rescue you from the trap it’s put you in and help steer you towards a life you’ll actually enjoy and other people will even appreciate more. I’m not going to tell you to stop caring about other people. I’m going to show you why trying to make them happy doesn’t work, and why making people happy doesn’t mean that you’re a good person. People pleasers aren’t bad, selfish or manipulative on purpose. There’s no conscious kind of manipulative drive here. In fact, if that was you, then you’re not really a people pleaser. If you know that you’re just using this to control people and you don’t actually care about them, then you’re more on the psychopathic or narcissistic spectrum. This post is for people who actually think of themselves as good people and think that making others happy is a good thing to be doing… Click here to keep reading on Dan’s blog. Or click on your preferred option below - Watch on YouTube - Listen on Soundcloud - Listen on Apple Podcasts - Listen on Spotify

Next week I’m running a live workshop for VIP members on using the 3X Model for building real confidence — the same structure I use with private clients who are stuck in overthinking, burnout, or avoidance. It's a practical system for getting yourself moving again when you know what to do… but aren’t doing it. We’ll cover: - Why confidence comes from structure, not mindset, so that you can override discouraging feelings - How to stop overthinking and start taking decisive action without doubting yourself - A simple cycle that prevents burnout and procrastination by relaxing while you take action - How to finish what you start so that you're constantly proud of yourself - Turning insight into actual behavioural change instead of information overwhelm You’ll leave with a clear personalized and repeatable process you can use any time you feel stuck — in work, relationships, or life direction. VIP members: you’re already entitled to attend this live session. Details are in the Calendar of the Brotherhood group. Not VIP yet? This is the kind of deeper, practical work that happens inside the paid Brotherhood membership ($50/month) — live workshops, direct application, and real-time course correction. If you’ve been sitting on the fence, this would be a very good week to step in.

Help me improve the Brojo community here on Skool. Vote below for the upgrade you'd like to see happen next (and suggest any others in the comments below)