Twenty-two years ago, I made a promise to myself that I would be 1 year sober for my 30th birthday. I drew a line in the sand for Labor Day and spent that day cleaning out everything in my apartment and taking it to the trash. The next day I went to my first meeting, and my life completely changed for the better. I never had a rock bottom moment, like I heard from so many people. I got lucky and never ended up in jail or with a DUI. But I knew that if I didn't change, that was the direction my life would go. I would be a slave to the bottom of the bottle, hooked on cigarettes and booze with a future of pain and sadness ahead of me. I gave up all of the things I thought I loved - Coors banquet, Shiner Bock, Mickey's, American Spirits, Marlboro Reds, little baggies of things that I didn't always know the names of, but took anyway. That first night was rough, and for the first week, it took every ounce of will power to not go to the store or pick up the phone. I learned to focus on other things, and slowly, gradually, over about 6 weeks, the cravings became less and less. I had a little newspaper clipping that showed how your body recovered from the effects of tobacco and alcohol after you stopped using them. It became my guiding light: At 2 months, my risk of heart attack drops 25%. At 6 months, my lungs stop hacking up nicotine, and I no longer cough all the time. At 1 year, my risk of lung disease is cut in half. At 5 years, my risk of cancer is similar to that of a non-smoker. At 15 years, it's like I never smoked at all. My parents gave me incentives, too. At 1 year, they told me they would pay for me to go on a vacation if I could keep it up. I decided that year to go to San Diego comic con. I had become very depressed and emotionally withdrawn. One of the negative effects of quitting was that I no longer had a social circle, and I had become agoraphobic, causing me to gain a lot of weight. I had become reclusive (I still am), and depressed, and so I saw this vacation as a last opportunity to do something fun and then exit stage left. I made plans to enjoy myself, say a few goodbyes, and then it would be over.