💧 moderate hydration water & 1 decaf Cappuciiiinooo (last one though going not just lactose free, but cutting out dairy again 100% to combat INFLAMMTION since it also AFFECTS the BRAIN NEGATIVELY VEEEERY MUCH. LIKE A LOT A LOT.. 🌞 short sun exposure, too hot to mess with the "outside"♨️ 🧘🏾‍♀️ breathing combined with meditating (short 7-8 Min.) 🌱 plant carbs 🥔, 🌽 🥚 sufficient protein intake, will improve over the next days 🎋 no paperwork today thanks goodness, only grocery shopping ☕️ sitting at a Café playing memory with ocean motives 🚿 shower in the evening 🍬 no more hydration drink, 1 sour candy 2s ice popsicle 👩🏽‍💻 screen time used & simultaneously read book about self love ✅️ 2-3% "betterment" to yesterday I'd say Not fully pulling through yet....Scared/afraid still. Started a new book now read about 70 pages. Usually I'd finish a book with 229 in 2hrs MAX. But I lost trust in myself (and interest in many things) due to being disappointed by nearly EVERY single one of the so called "spiritual" teachers, mentors, "coaches" and other 99 names, titles and whatever they give themselves. Big part of why I got tired of of it all. Tired of believing in anyone or anything really. Yeah there's a higher power, but for the most part human beings seems to just wanna exploit that be it via organized religion (and yeah most of them be it Asia, Europe, Africa, Americas....at least the places in those 4 continents I been so far), non-religious spiritual communities ESPECIALLY the "starseed" and "twin flame" cults (simply because those are the two you can make the most bank with, before it was the non-traditional "reiki" attunements which people charged anywhere from 1$ to 5000€s and more. Can't make that much with regular Reiki and the number of attunements are finite, not endless spiral of "new" energies every damn day.). Aside from the "manifestation" community thats been more popular to everyone vs 10-15 yrs ago only via books, cds, tapes even still and live events/retreats at most. So while maybe since N.G. people have been going to seminars and what not, it weren't as many people. Especially dangerous for young folks since I read about some of them endings their lives over it. But I noticed this in every big thing of the times. Even animal shelters turned into something "demonic" almost with them fighting each other for clout = money and it's sad that people that just love something and want to make this world just a little better (Mikayla from Save a Fox for example) get destroyed. Aside from financial ruin for many (I know people that invested in business coaches that lost way more than me only to find out they been bamboozled all along as one of maaany), the emotional toll is worse, especially those seeking help for family or relationship issues. And unlike Jim 99.9% have a no refund policy, and most don't have anything to show for themselves, be it starseed, twin flame, business or the manifesting coaches.

....if I am.not suppose to be posting this. I tried posting twice and both times it didn't work. So third times the charm. If something doesn't work after trying twice & trice I'll usually give up. Basically I was saying I was missing a piece that helps me pull through with the new challenge. I am pretty positive I found it with a certain book. One of the tasks is meditation with breathwork, so this aligns with the tasks in both Level 2&1. I'm really glad I came across this while reading an article about self love. It's THE one thing I've always tried to do/accomplish and never succeeded sadly. Everyone tells you to just love yourself, do things for you, practices self care and mental diet. Well that's easy to say if you don't have trauma and ADHD or neither.... Having to always work 18x harder than anyone else is literally physically depleting. And often times we already run on fumes just showering, eating and doing other stuff that's just normal for everyone else. Anyway I'm glad I stumbled across this and I am reading it, even though I simultaneously am watching yt. Yeah not great, but better than not reading/doing something for myself at all.