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The Men's Wellness Club
137 members • Free
9 contributions to The Men's Wellness Club
10d •
I need some opinions and toughts on breaking up.
As some of you knows from my previous posts i have been in a bad state of life as well as bad relationship that causes it. In short for those who might not know my situation- my girlfriend has taken away my social media, dreams, hobbies and controls every single little thing in my life I would love some opinions and toughts on these things: 1. Should i leave if i know it might cause her to do bad stuff to herself and i might ruin her school progress? 2. If you answered yes to 1- how should i do it in the nicest way possible and how do i get the strenght to do so? 3. If you answered no to 1- what could i do to make this better and get out of the bad cycles without leaving her? Thanks to everyone for your time and opinion/toughts. Have a nice day y'all🌞😊
1 like • 5d
@Artūrs Valters hi. what i feel will be the best is like slowly disconnect with her like i think dong a break up directly will make u also sad and u dont even want to ruin her life and thats good and it show that u care truly and u are not leaving or braking up for the sake . U are doing this bcuz it is the best for you as it is dragging u both down so slowly start disconnecting and start making boundries like thats enough . try this for some time as a final try and if this also just does not work then it is going to be hard but u might have to leave her for the best of both of you . It will hurt a lot but in some month u will definitely heal atleast some and will try to move on . But in starting everyday are going to feel like i should reconnect , ask one last time , give one last chance , just once more But what i felt is the starting time is the hardest thenn it wi get better i am still not good but atleast better than 2months ago . That is all what i feel truly
0 likes • 17h
@Artūrs Valters hey ! i hope it end well for you . in my case it was not in a relationship but i felt we were too close emotionally or idk what to say . The thing is when i asked then she told me she liked me earlier but had lost interest and is now not interested which was the sad part . The reason i was able to tell you was because i felt she had been losing interest in me for some months as earlier even though i had no cofirmation i felt she definitely liked me . But i delayed it bcuz we were not meeting offline much and mostly it was online or occasionally so i tried to improve on that but that backfired ig cuz i slowly started to do all this and till then ig it was too late . The only2 reason why i asked bcuz 1- she was not ignoring and stuff but i felt she was not happy to meet for the first time like she was not exicited if i can frame it 2. I was overthinking seeking advice and whole day just thinkin abt this which was having a toll on my life big time . so i just gathered courage and just asked her even though at that time i was 99 percent sure she does not like me back . But after that the starting time was rly rly diificult. Rn also it has only been 2 month but slowly i have found some things to improve on and learn abt me that is i got time for myself . Still it is very painful whenever i think abt it and ik it will go slowly but the suffering is problem. So the early u do the better it is . Who knows some serious talk might let her know how u feel and SET CLEAR BOUNDRIES or the other case u will go through pain and find urself and ur enjoyment the good old self which u were !! I am just writing this bcuz as i feel rn i should have asked her earlier which would have been best but i delayed thinking it will be fine and till i realised it was too late . So if here a way u could improve on ur relationship and ur life is know . Hope u find this helpful and keep updating i would love to know if anything works out ! thanks man
8d •
Getting too overwhelmed. What to do ?
Hi recently i have been trying to understand and improve upon communication skills , relationships , psychology type stuff etc and i am rly feeling too overwhelmed and exhausted . For ex the week before this week for amazing when i started to focus less on other people but rather on me . But this week i am exhausted every time it is rly hard and improving on all this had affected me as from two days from now i have my exams and i am just not able to study . Whenever i try i just cant focus and from the past few days i am again going back to old self where i overthink every single thing . I keep thinking abt in the past around 2yrs ago where apparently i was very famous and all . I also again go back to think abt a girl . I am again overthinking every convo(like i used to do some time ago) i have with my friends at school and again feeling i am playing all those mental tricks instead of actually be what i am and focus less on other opinion . Also ik what the life is online is just a part but seeing things like u should make friends now improve ur relation with them they are the one who will stay with you for ur life and help . Seeing various shorts with people with different thing trying and posting all sorts of thing is putting a toll on my life . Recently i was not posting bcuz i felt i was fine but in the past few days i am just not able to cope up . My exams are coming and i am just not able to study and to tell i am like a rly good in studies but this time i didnt complete my syllabus the problem is i am not even trying to do in such a crisis also . Earlier whenever this happened i used to do in the last days but i am just not willing to study and keep thinking abt friendships , relationships and all the various social stuff wayyyy too much .. I see all the video being uploaded on yt and here also various things but idk why rn i am not priortizing my studies (may be bcuz these exams dont impact my results) but i have real big exams coming up in the next 2 months .
0 likes • 5d
@Tom Bidgood hi tysmm for ur advice . Just one last thing i wanna ask is like my exams are continuously till like next 3 month so should i just stop on this social skills like what is a small and manageable goal or like how to not get "worse" is the question. Cause bcuz of this too much i dont want to go where i overthink every single convo atleast if i am not improving i dont want to get worse ...
0 likes • 17h
@Ioan Evgeniev hey thank you for ur advice i will try do it
5d •
Overthinking every single conversations!??
i just want to ask a simple question that as i mentioned in the previous post i have like lot of exams coming up in the next 3 months so i am going to meet less people now as more and more people are focusing on study . So idk like earlier rn i should feel a need to met more and more people and improve on these things or how to go abt it like small realistic goals but like what and how ?? Also like recently as i am meeting less people I am again going back to the old habit OF OVERTHINKING every singlee conversation like rly every thing . ik i is bad but as i talk i a thinking am i saying the correct stuff or being the person i wanna be or like improving or not type stuff . SO like i am not able to decide how to go abt this as i dont think not talking to people 3 months is good also the prob is just i am again going back to overthinking every single convo which i dont rly wanna go . The thing i just want is like if i am not improving i should be "worse" this is my main concern and worry as i want when these exams get over and i am in the new class i wann to be THE NEW ME and be good where ever i am lacking like overthinking , physical fitness , trying to get real good friendship with emotional connection (idk what to say abt this )...
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14d •
For everyone who chose relationships in my last poll — what’s the #1 relationship challenge you’re facing?
Please explain why in 1-2 sentences
Poll
12 members have voted
0 likes • 14d
like started talking with a girl in this year jan who i had known for a long time ago . I liked her from jan only didnt knew she liked me too . Idk till when she liked me but when i asked her she told she lost interest and thought i didnt like her gave up . I felt this was going to happen to before i asked 1-2 months i tried meeting her texting her but it just did not came back. Now whenever i see her it is just sad and she is my school . Sad thing she used to like me i felt it but thought first need to start talking offline or idk before i didnt knew that . Tried a lot after feeling she was pulling back but nothing worked . Whenever i see her it is just a flashback i dont even know if i should like start talking to her or what like ignore her idkkk. We are still on good terms but like i cant talk to her as a friend but not talking and ignoring her daily is a challenge it is rly hard knowing i had a real chance . Not desperate for a gf just that she is a rly good person overall Its been 1 and half month since i asked but like time and time again i remember all memories and stuff and yeah it is not easy to overcome it. now whenever i see her or her friends cant make myself to not seem lower . It just feels like i lost .
0 likes • 13d
@Jon Cooke is all this normal and should i expect myself to heal till now or is it fine cause it is just been like 45 days ?
20d •
SHOULD I READ ANY BOOKS IF YES WHICH ONE?
Hello everyone as i am on improving myself as much can in teenage around 15 16yrs of age i am rn . So i would like some advice on which book u would recommend or u have read to improve yourself , ur mindset improve ur social skills and overall helped you a lot . As there are any things rn going on i will not be able to dedicate hours to books only some time here and there so are there any book recommendations ? Any books which u had read and felt like amazing or any book which u hoped u found earlier to improv ur life. thanks!
0 likes • 15d
@Siddhant Katariya yeah i do understand that and i tbh actually felt that during school couple of days ago and it did made me feel a bit better when i was just being my authentic like idk and still confused to how to be the authentic does that mean not going with friends everytime they ask or like disagree with many things stil not pretty clear . Just confused in lot of stuf but i wil try to focus and ya ik how imp enjoying life is as like 1 year ago i think i was at the lowest whether it be my sports my friends everything so ya i understood that even if we not the best or be less good but it is imp to enjoy ur life . But may times it is just difficult to that overthinking comes, old memories come which is real hard to deal with . Like when i also see everyone with someone whether be a partner be someone else it just make me think am i wrong for like all this . Should i just also do like everyone like get a gf do insta (as i dont use it ) but it is just tiring now to see people and not myself. I am overwhelmed with stuff so ya idk if i am able to explain my self clearly but hope u would understand . Also btw i am not a introverted person atleast like more towards extroverted side but all this makes me rethink . Thanks for the help
0 likes • 15d
@Mark Winter Ya i am doing that i have started to workout regularly , try to just talk without trying to think what the other person would think , seeing yt videos about healing ,communication and all the things i feel sad or less good abt , just talk to someone new or someone i do less talk to without thinking they would see my as desperate . Thanks
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