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7d • General Discussion
📱 Screen Time, Devices, and Trauma Impacted Children
This is a BIG topic in our house and we are discussing it today in our brand new community Trauma Informed Parenting
Honestly, if Kai could, I think he would happily spend his whole life on a screen!
And I know many parents and carers here will relate to the constant balancing act between:
Allowing regulation and comfort
Setting healthy boundaries
Reducing conflict
Encouraging offline life
And trying not to drown in guilt whichever decision we make.
I think with trauma impacted children, we sometimes need to look deeper than:
“Screens are bad.”
Because for many children, devices can provide things their nervous systems are desperately seeking:
Predictability
Control
Escapism
Dopamine
Social connection
Reduced demand
Safety
Regulation
Comfort after overwhelm
For some children, gaming worlds feel safer and more manageable than the real world.
That does not mean unlimited screen time is healthy or helpful.
But I do think it means we need to approach the topic with curiosity and compassion.
In our house, we often notice that the biggest explosions are not actually about the screen itself…
They are about transition, loss of regulation, loss of control, and the nervous system suddenly being asked to shift states.
And honestly? Sometimes screens are also one of the only places trauma impacted or neurodivergent children feel competent, connected, successful, or calm.
Things we try to think about are:
What need is the screen meeting right now?
Is this connection, escape, regulation, or avoidance?
What happens before, during, and after screen use?
How can we support transitions more safely?
Are we increasing connection alongside boundaries?
Sometimes we need limits.
Sometimes we need flexibility.
Sometimes we need to pick our battles.
Sometimes we need to sit next to Kai and enter their world instead of trying to pull him out of it.
And most importantly:
I think many of us are doing far better than we think we are.
Would love to hear how others navigate screen/device time in your homes?
Join our community here: Trauma Informed Parenting
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📱 Screen Time, Devices, and Trauma Impacted Children
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