It's that time again! Comment below by calling your shot for this week: What healthy, value-based action do you commit to doing this week to improve your life? And how did you get on with last week's commitment? https://www.skool.com/brojo-the-integrity-army-6491/monday-accountability-52624f13?p=fd82d468

It's that time again! Comment below by calling your shot for this week: What healthy, value-based action do you commit to doing this week to improve your life? And how did you get on with last week's commitment?

Catastrophizing is the word we use to describe getting stuck in your head imagining horrible outcomes for the future that are probably not going to happen. While they feel very reasonable, real, and likely when you’re drowning in these negative fantasies, statistically they’re extremely unlikely. This is not the same as planning for possible setbacks. There is no real planning happening here, just imagining disastrous consequences, with no thought given to how you’d actually handle these possibilities and survive them. So you know you’re catastrophizing when you’re a) imagining terrible futures, b) focusing on least likely outcomes more than most likely, and c) you’re not planning how to successfully navigate these things if they do happen. Why does this happen? Catastrophizing is a kind of mental misfire; an error in your brain’s code. It’s the combination of anxiety with imagination and hyper-fixation on threats. From an early age, or following some significant trauma, you got into a habit of worrying about worst case scenarios. The simple fact of repeating this process also validates it and reinforces it, so that nowadays you catastrophize simply because you always catastrophize. You’re somewhat addicted to indulging these negative fantasies. This unhelpful and pointless process occurs because deep down you don’t trust yourself, and you don’t trust the universe. You don’t believe you can handle unexpected things going wrong, and you assume bad things are more likely to happen than good things. So you’re left worrying about bad things happening and not being able to handle them. Your brain seems to believe that imagining things going devastatingly wrong, over and over, will somehow protect you from them. And yet, you never actually problem-solve. You only imagine the outcome, never your response to it. So catastrophizing feels important and necessary, even unavoidable, and yet it provides no value. You just sit there worrying and panicking, and it does not lead to improvement in your skills, helpful problem-solving, or better reactions to setbacks.

I've noticed that instead of directly saying No, I'd revolve around it by being super diplomatic and making it palatable for the other person by providing lengthy explanations and details, they didn't care about. Now, I've decided to say no first and then see if I need to justify it, based on who is infront of me. How've you guys gotten comfortable saying no without feeling guilty or risking abandonment?

We missed last week, my bad! Comment below by calling your shot for this week: What healthy, value-based action do you commit to doing this week to improve your life? And how did you get on with last week's commitment?