Before - DURING - After

Before and after!

These photo’s are all so incredible and truly inspirational. Congratulations to each and every one of you here and thanks to Joy St john @joy-st-john-3489

for introducing me to Dr. Cody!

As l thought about the before and after photos and was truly dreading taking a current photo of myself with all the shame that goes with extra pounds … I realized something was missing. You see, the thing that was missing was the true before photo which in my opinion should be the photo which captures who l was and how l was before the journey that l had to take that we all had to take that got us to here. Different journey’s for each of us, no doubt yet we all find ourselves here together at this moment in time.

There truly is a “before” BEFORE the “before” photos. This photo reflects my before photo that l intend to get back to after all that stuff happened during the during phase of my life and that was not pretty.

There’s a story to each one of us and that story is how we arrived to the traditional “before” photos which l believe should be referred to as the “DURING” photos. This is where l got stuck and this is the “where life happened” photo. This is why l am here and even before l start the FitOver40 program, l pledge to myself and to you no matter what the number is on the scale this journey will be the beginning of showing up for myself as my authentic self. To me this means heart centric with my heart leading the way. The ability to do this is there yet- l switched it off so so many years ago bk l was told that was a sign of weakness and never to show emotion. This may be raw and real but I’m all in.

The photo you see here is truly my “before” life happened photo. I have every intention of returning to her. She’s always been here with me, waiting patiently to climb out of this fake, phony, super heavy & uncomfortable suit l have been wearing for decades - it kept getting bigger, then would recede a bit but ultimately even bigger than before.

My true, authentic body and higher self has been über patient and loving so, when she reappears finally this time, l predict it will be for good and for the rest of my earthly life. This future self is wiser not just because of things thrown my way during the “during” phase of my life but truly despite all the things.

The dreaded and l mean dreaded “during” photo that l snapped (and extremely hesitantly shared with Dr. Cody) was a photo of a person wearing a temporary shell primarily used to keep people away and hide under a false sense of insecurity. I proclaim and declare that my “after” photo will be posted right here sometime in the not too far future.

I’m terrified of failure and at the same time excited for the outcome no matter what the number on the scale says nor the biometrics. I’m here. I’m showing up fully, wholly and as transparent as l have ever been. Thanks for sharing this extremely personal journey with me.

I’m humbled, I’m tired yet l’m ready as ever.

Watch me roar!

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Before - DURING - After