Since returning to Formosa, I have encountered many situations beyond words. I realized that using nicknames can imply a lack of respect, and addressing someone directly by their surname is considered rude. This reminds me of an ancient teaching: "Teaching by words is inferior to teaching by example, and teaching by example is inferior to teaching by environment." In this context, "environment" (Jing) can extend to the state of meditative absorption (Samadhi), yet it also reflects the reality of human relationships. Enduring this is painful. This is clearly explained in the philosophies of Laozi and Zhuangzi. Despite having only a primary school level of Chinese, I somehow possess a deep understanding of classical texts. I find Taoist scriptures easy to comprehend, as if I am experiencing them personally. Energy manifests in various forms, and religious energies differ from one another. As someone in arts and visual effects, I find these impossible to replicate. My reflection is that after WWII, many lost their heritage and family upbringing. Everything started from scratch, making it impossible to learn traditional culture; most of it was destroyed. In the struggle for survival, morality was naturally lost. Now that I see things clearly, I must make a decision. It is a feeling of profound helplessness.

I wanted to ask something to the people here who went from “doing well” to genuinely reaching another level in business/life — for example from consistent 20k months to 50k+, or from 5 to 6 figure months. Not only strategically, but internally. I’ve noticed something in myself recently and I’m trying to understand it deeper instead of just forcing my way through it. Last month I reached a trading goal I had been working toward for a long time, and then for some reason I gave back almost half of it. It felt less like a lack of skill and more like some kind of unconscious ceiling or worthiness pattern. Almost like every 2 steps forward, I take 3 back. And the strange part is: I know how much I’ve already overcome to even get here. Trading changed my life in many ways. It’s what pushed me into healing, breathwork, emotional regulation, self-awareness, learning about human behaviour, self-love, discipline, and becoming a better person to myself and to the people around me. It stopped being only about money a while ago. I also don’t really want to become a content creator or chase attention online. I genuinely love trading itself because of how deeply it mirrors psychology and identity. It exposes everything. What I’m trying to understand is: what kind of inner work, belief work, nervous system work, paradigm shifts, or identity changes did you have to go through to stop unconsciously returning to old patterns when you were close to the next level? Because I do put a lot of work into myself daily, it is 24/7. I work with a holistic therapist every few days, I do breathwork, meditation, self-observation, and I’ve become much kinder to myself than I used to be. Before, I would destroy myself mentally after mistakes. Now I can hold myself with compassion while still taking accountability. But still… I sometimes catch myself behaving in ways that don’t match the person I know I’m becoming. In trading we often say: “the market pays you exactly what you believe you’re worth.”