SO HERE’S THE THING So I know I’ve already shared that I can’t be as present as I normally am, which I have been feeling a little bit of pressure about, but I’m not gonna keep harping on about that because HELLO, life is lifing. Instead I thought… what would be a really good way for me to still keep presence in this space without forcing myself to be everywhere all at once. So here I am, just telling you what’s actually going on, very much as it is, from the jungle, here in BALI. CONTEXT BECAUSE IT MATTERS DUH Yesterday, 13 beautiful ladies arrived on the SACRED AF retreat, which I’m running with my friend Lucy here in Bali, and honestly… oof. There has been a LOT of last-minute organising, and last week was hectic trying to run this online business, which I FUCKING LOVE, while also stepping into in-person retreats again after a long time. The venue is absolutely LUSH AF, tucked away in the jungle in Ubud, Bali, and when the women arrived, something just shifted straight away. CURRENTLY IN THE JUNGLE, FYI They all arrived, said their hellos, checked into their rooms, got welcome coconuts, we gave out personalised branded gift bags with water bottles and journals, and then we did a beautiful ceremony to make offerings to the Balinese gods. AND THIS PART FEELS TOTES IMPORTANT It was a brand new experience for most of them, and instantly the whole place felt grounded, safe, calm, and very held. There was a little bit of tiredness for me and Lucy, because hosting is A LOT, your eyes and ears are always on, you’re answering questions, holding space, running sessions, being present at all times, but me and Lucy have such a good balance working together, which honestly makes everything so much easier. FUNNY STORY TIME And here’s the funny bit. I met Lucy maybe six months ago here in Bali through a friend. We literally went for a beer together, and within TEN MINUTES we were like… “should we do a retreat?” And here we are. Actual real life. ANYWAY… BACK TO IT We did a few more bits last night, then the heavens opened, the rain poured, everyone was tired, and we all went to bed early.

(MOST PEOPLE DO THIS BACKWARDS) WHAT IF… instead of writing another promo post that does the job (promotes) but nobody actually wants to READ, you turned it into something people actually stop at, nod along to, and think “oh holy guacamole… yeah… that’s me”. Because I keep seeing and hearing HEAPS of peeps saying things like “I don’t know what to talk about” or “I don’t really have anything to post right now” and every single time I hear that my brain goes… hmmmmmm… do you though? Or are you just bored of what you think you’re meant to say… Because usually what’s actually happening is people feel like they SHOULD be talking about their FEATURES, their OFFERS, their COMMUNITY UPDATES, their LINKS, their CALENDAR, their LATEST THING, and when that starts to feel forced or boring or same-same, they just… stop posting altogether. Which is fine, (all epic stuff btw) obvs. No judgement. I’ve done that. MANY MANY TIMES. But it is also the fastest way to sound like everyone else #gulp (blending in sucks) AND then feel a bit meh aka poop about showing up at all. here’s the bit I really wanna land, because this is the bit so many people miss while they’re overthinking their captions. YOU ARE ALREADY DOING THE CONTENT!!! Like… literally already living it. You’re IN it. You’re having the conversations. You’re having the wobbles. You’re having the WOOPS. You’re doing the actual thing you say you help people with… and then you just… don’t talk about THAT bit. And I reckon it’s because that bit feels too normal to you. Or too messy. Or not “finished” enough. Or you tell yourself “oh I’ll share this once I’ve figured it out” and then three weeks pass, you’ve moved on, and the GOLD has fully vanished. Poof. Gone. Bye Bye So instead of asking “what should I talk about”, which honestly makes most peeps freeze even harder and stare at the screen like it’s personally attacking them, I wanna flip the question completely. What did you ACTUALLY DO this week???? And I mean actually-actually.

NOT EVERYTHING IS MEANT TO BE GOT. AND I’M KINDA OK WITH THAT…. So I was in another community this morning. One of those spaces where you can ask for feedback on your About page. You know the ones. And I put the BACKROOM in there, partly out of curiosity, partly because I’m nosy, partly because I actually don’t mind when people say “I don’t get it.” I really don’t. No offence taken. ZERO. And guess what. A HEAPS A PEEPS didn’t get it. And honestly… I was like, yeah. That makes TOTES sense to me Because the BACKROOM isn’t meant to be got. It’s not a thing you read once and go “ah yes, I fully understand this concept.” It’s not a neat little box. It’s not a promise of one shiny outcome. It’s not “do X and you’ll get Y by Tuesday.” It’s not even really a product, if I’m being honest. It’s a SPACE. And that’s the bit people seem to struggle with a lot. Because we’re so used to needing to explain the outcome before we’re allowed to exist somewhere. I have been this person big time. What’s the result? What do I get? What will I be in three months? What’s the transformation? What’s the funnel? What’s the thingy thing? And the BACKROOM sits in that bit that many people skip. Or rush. Or avoid completely. It’s the bit BEFORE the action. Before the doing.Before the posting.Before the selling.Before the strategy. It’s the messy middle. The wobble. The thinking-out-loud. The saying-the-thing-before-you’re-ready bit. The “is it just me?” bit. The confidence wobble. The WOOP moments. The WOBBLE moments. The very HUMAN “I’m in it” bit. And yeah, people asked me things like “I’m not sure what you sell.” again I was like… yeah. Because tbf I’m not selling an outcome in here. Not a universal one anyway. The outcome is different for every single epic person inside. And that’s kinda the whole point. The outcome is that you get to be YOU.Right now As you totes are. Not future you.Not polished you.Not healed-you-with-a-bow-on-top. Just you. In it. With other humans. Doing life and business and community and creativity and doubt and excitement all at once.

Right then. So…. Not so long back I met this… person? human? called Barbara or Barbs (which ever tickles your fancy, she will take both) TBH I’ve never met anyone quite like her before, and I say that with my whole body because she is… how do I put this politely… hmmm… KINDA WEIRD 😂 Like totes kinda weird. In a very are you ok? way. And also in a please-never-change way. Both can be true at the same time. She’s a bit of a rebel, doesn’t take any BS poop, doesn’t entertain nonsense poop stuff, doesn’t sugarcoat, and abso-fricken-lutely does not do that fake polite nodding malarky thing when something feels off. She’ll just say it. Sometimes I’m like 😬. Sometimes I’m like 😂. Sometimes I’m like ugh fine you’re right but I hate that you’re right. That kinda energy, d’ya know the kind? also she’s cheeky AF a tad bit naughty, says things that make me roll my eyes while laughing, which is honestly a very specific badass skill. n’ yes, sometimes she thinks she’s funny… and YES sometimes she actually is BIT TIME, sometimes… well… we forgive her. Because she humans a lot. Deeply. Loudly. With naff all shame. Her spelling though WOW. Truly shocking. Crimes against the alphabet, makes up her own words. Invents spelling-ings. Smashes letters together and just rolls it out. I actually heard she has a sticky space bar, and simply said she has better things to do than go fix it, deal with it, loll-ing, zero apology. Teeheeing but somehow that just makes her more her. Like if she suddenly started spelling things correctly I’d be very concerned. listen… she has this completely random a$$ obsession with pickles and dogs. WHY THE EF? No one really knows. Does it relate to the deep conversations we’re having? Absolutely not mostly. Will she bring them up anyway? DUH HELLO YES. Mid-thought. Mid-depth. Mid-momenting. Just casually drops in like, “also pickles though” and you’re sat there like… okay Barbara… noted… unclear why… moving on on…. 👣 And the mental image is always the same...

I’ve been sitting with the word COMMUNITY lately, like actually sitting with it, turning it over, poking it, side-eyeing it, because everyone and their dog uses it but hardly anyone talks about what it REALLY means. My brain kinda did that thing where it goes quiet for a second and then goes, “oh… OH… HELLO THERE. BARARA.”(that is my brain btw, yes I am weird, yes I am owning it) Community ain’t a platform. It sure ain’t a feature. It ain’t a strategy. It ain’t something you slap a name on and hope people behave nicely inside it. Mwah It’s a feeling. An internal hearty body-thing. A human thing. A “do I feel safe enough to be myself here?” thingy And when it’s missing, everything else feels HARD AF. (that’s the meh part) HERE ARE MY MIND BREAKDOWNS AKA THE PINGALINGS 💡 → BREAKING THE WORD OPEN (LIGHT BULB MOMENT) If you actually break the word down, it’s COMMON + UNITY. COMMON, as in shared ground. Shared experiences. Shared fears. Shared “is it just me that has a name for my brain?” (hmm do not answer that lol 😝) thoughts UNITY, as in togetherness, not sameness. Not everyone agreeing. Not everyone doing the same thing. Just choosing to stand together anyway. That’s it. That’s the root. That’s the OG meaning before marketing got its marketing mitts on it. Humans didn’t gather because it was pretty and cute. We gathered because it was how we survived. We needed each other to eat, to build, to grieve, to celebrate, to make sense of the world. Our bodies still remember that, even if our calendars and apps have made us forget it. → HOW COMMON + UNITY IS ACTUALLY BUILT (NOT THE FLUFFY VERSION — I SAVE THAT FOR DOGS + LOTS OF THEM) 🐾 Here’s what actually builds it, and this is basically my entire OBSESSION in life and business, HELLO. Someone says the thing out loud that everyone else is quietly thinking but hasn’t had the guts to say yet. A wobble. A doubt. A “this feels off but I don’t know why.”And suddenly ten people go, “OH MY DOG, SAME.” That’s COMMON ground right there.