Right, I’ve written this and deleted it about four + or more times now (actually lost count), because I honestly cannot face another round of rejection... So I’m just gonna say it before I bottle it again, because I’ve been going round in circles for ages and I NEED to say it out loud. This has been a 𝗧𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗛, 𝗧𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗛 𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗧 kinda year, financially, mentally and emotionally. There are things I can’t share, but here’s some of it, and stay with me till the bottom because there’s a bit at the end I really want you to see 👇 A long-term client stopped paying me, after I’d already done months of work for free. TBH it hurts more than the money does, because of the lack of respect. Then the SACRED AF retreats I run here in Bali are no more, gutted AF. We’d filled our next one for Feb 2027, and after sorting all the logistics we hit a really difficult situation getting the permits together. Months of looking, crying, stressing, trying EVERYTHING we could, and in the end there was no solution I was willing to risk (my home and my life are here in Bali, and deportation is very real), so it’s cancelled. We had to refund every deposit and payment, which came to thousands upon thousands, and yes I know it wasn’t our money, but it’s still a 𝗛𝗨𝗚𝗘 𝗹𝗼𝘀𝘀, and it was heartbreaking… On top of that my general clients and online work started to fade, contracts ended, things got harder to sell, and I got to the point where I was SCARED to put another offer out there because I couldn’t handle another round of being ignored. Which then makes me feel like a total failure as a business mentor and coach, and that’s a horrible circle to be in. I’ve used up my savings now and I’m living day by day, and I am TIRED and FED THE FCK UP of things being hard…when will this fucking end And I’m going to be completely honest with you, because I don’t know how else to do this: I’m getting pretty damn desperate. I know that’s the worst thing you’re supposed to say when you’re selling, because desperation is meant to put people off, but it’s also the truth, and I’ve got no energy left to dress it up. I need sales right now. Real ones, this month. I feel a bit ashamed saying all that, to be honest, but you know I don’t hold back from the truth, and I’d rather be straight with you than put on an “everything’s amazing!” face.