Letting.go of who I was is hard to do. Even though that person doesn't exsist anymore. I still dream of her healthy and whole. The saddest part is the expectation of those that expect me to be the same.

I isolated from my family back in April to help understand myself better and to get away from the negative feelings they kept bringing up. I wanted to feel their actions were out of love, but their intent felt more controlling. Well yesterday my brother reached out and I decided to put myself into the fire and respond. I was honest and said I didn't understand his intent, he said it was just to say hi to his sister, but I could feel there was more and couldnt let go of it. I still moved forward with the conversation and we had, what from the outside world may look like, a good conversation reminiscing about the past. However, many of the details he kept bringing up varied from what we have said in the past and it put me in a hyperintense state that was harder and harder to get out of as the conversation progressed. It brought up my memory issues from when my brain shut down and the issues I have around family who, while my brain was shutting down, thought it would be a good idea to intently throw my fears back in my face to try to help me accept them. Me being the honest person I am, I told him that I really couldn't understand his intent with reaching out and bringing up the past and that it was too much for me. Then today, I got a text from him that said he just wanted to say hi to his sister didn't understand why I was being so so difficult and that I shouldn't bother responding bc he's not going to talk to me for a long, long time. His message reminded me why I had to isolate and I instantly went into defense mode and wanted to rebut, but I didn't. I told him he should do whatever he feels he needs to and I left it at that. However, now the feelings are lingering and I can't figure out why. I know he made me feel baited and belittled for a response and that his actions remind me of our parents, but I can't figure out how to accept and let it pass. I am able to calm down and move on temporarily but it keeps raising its ugly head. Any advice?

When was the first time you realized energy affects matter? That moment when it clicked that vibration shapes reality? I’d love to hear your story! I’ll go first… 👇

Why do you think some people don’t like vegans… I get questioned alot when people find out that I am They sort of get defensive and roll their eyes at me.. ‘What do you eat?’ ‘Plants have feelings too!’ ‘Do you get enough protein?’ Cows eat grass they don’t eat meat.. My ‘family’ find it weird .. I love animals and don’t want to contribute to their suffering and I feel lighter and healthier …and don’t get sick much.. my intuition became stronger.. it works for me.. I don’t judge others for eating meat at all.. I can’t judge cause I have eaten it before too.. and I don’t preach or say they should be vegan…it just happened one day and I became aware of what I was eating .. and my life has changed since..

Share one thing you did this week that you’re proud of! I made steady progress on a goal I’ve been working on by focusing on daily actions this week’s consistency is my win.