Question of the day -- Is negativity draining or is it a false belief?

Who did you have to be as a kid to receive the love or approval of mom and dad? Perfect? Quiet? A pleaser? Self reliant? This right here is one of the biggest shifts I see people have in coaching or at live events The roles we took on as a kid become the subconscious identity as an adult For me I adopted a role of “pleaser” due to having a controlling hard to please step mom If I could ease tension I could feel “safe” My dad had that pattern too and modeled it by not challenging or being assertive in his relationship For me to break this pattern I had to become “BAD” to the old role To be “good” meant to abandon myself, to make others happy, etc BAD was being selfish, expressing my emotions, setting boundaries, etc For me to create this SHIFT… I had to lean into tension and express the real me I had to take on the values of "authenticity" and “vulnerability” I had to catch my desire to ease other people's tension and let them sit with it knowing it is theirs not mine to manage This tension became the initiation into a new me Years ago as I started this shift I had to reconnect to certain friends to express how I felt I had to be honest moving forward over wanting approval It resulted in self respect, self acceptance and feeling safe inside of my own body And the crazy thing… as a result others respected me as a reflection I was able to go deeper with people and felt more connected to myself and THEM Yes some people fell out of my life as a result of this authenticity… and in their place other relationships and friendships formed It's all a part of the process :) What role are you letting go of or becoming aware of? What would be a way of leaning into the tension of breaking that pattern? And who would you be without that pattern? Remember, it's a pattern… NOT you :) Talk to you soon, Aaron (you’re the SOUL not the ROLE) Doughty

What is something people recognise you for? (It could be physical, a skill, or your career). And did people stop recognising you once you stopped doing it, or changed it?

This past year has been beautiful and scary all at the same time. I started my journey with a body that had very little mobility and didn't know how to move without being completely tense. It's easy to notice the changes when looking back but doubt will still creap in here and there to challenge me. Weeeeelllll. Doubt was challenged this weekend when I had to travel via plane twice. For 10 years prior to this trip I would always get patted down going through TSA due to a bad shoulder, it never failed, and became normal.... but this weekend... This weekend I waited to get called to the side but it never happened.. both airports treated me like any other person going through TSA, except this chick drew tears both times bc it was so reaffirming of my progress and the changes I have made in my body. 🙌🥳😏 Keep going, keep growing, keep changing.

Dear Human, I know. You thought I was loneliness wearing beige. Unfortunate branding on my part. Every time I arrive, people panic.They grab their phones. Open six apps. Text someone they absolutely should not text. Suddenly they “miss” a person who gave them anxiety, confusion, and lower back pain. Classic. But I need you to understand something: I did not come into your life to punish you. I came to introduce you to yourself. I’m the quiet after the chaos. The space where your thoughts stop fighting for microphone time. The moment you realize half your exhaustion came from performing versions of yourself for people who barely knew you. I know I feel uncomfortable at first. When we first meet, you call me: “boredom” “emptiness” “why is it so quiet in here?” and occasionally: “maybe I should get bangs.” Please resist the last one. Stay with me long enough and I’ll show you things: ✨ what peace actually feels like ✨ how to enjoy your own energy ✨ which relationships drain your spirit like expired phone chargers ✨ and how much of your life was built around avoiding yourself People think confidence comes from attention. It doesn’t. Confidence is eating alone without feeling like a rejected side character. Traveling alone without narrating your existence for validation. Sitting in silence without needing constant stimulation like an emotionally caffeinated squirrel. Remember: Your external reality shifts when your internal state shifts. Well… I’m one of the backstage crew members helping with that transformation. I help you stop choosing people out of fear. I help you hear your intuition again. I help your nervous system unclench like a fist that forgot it was safe. And eventually something beautiful happens: You stop asking: “Who will stay with me?” Because now your energy says: “I already enjoy being here. We are enough. We choose on purpose, not in need.” That’s when love changes. You stop chasing. Stop settling. Stop treating breadcrumbs like a spiritual sign from the universe.