Disappointed I guess is the right word?

I was such great friends with a girl from my town. Knew her for years, worked together and dabbled in powder the odd time (before I became an addict). Her mom is on my Facebook (she goes out with my cousin) and noticed she shared a picture of my friend from years ago with sad faces. I found out she is deep into dope. Like disappeared completely. Don’t even know if she’s alive. My heart is crushed. I actually cried. This situation shows me what my family felt. What my friends felt. I am so glad to be clean. This feeling hurts so bad.

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Disappointed I guess is the right word?