What's Spinning💿 - Fame · High Vibe Tribe

What's Spinning💿 - Fame

My new homegirl Miley released the video for "Walk of Fame" today.

I've been loving this song for the last few weeks. It speaks to me on so many levels. I was recently wrestling with my fear of fame I had my whole life (although I didn't realize it was fear).

When I was a child I wanted to be a singer/rock star. I've always loved singing and was in choirs and chorus in school. But I had stage fright and couldn't do solos.

In the 8th grade (around 1990) I was invited to try out for the school FAME (Laguardia Performing Arts). My mother tortured me the night before my audition and I bawled my eyes out all night and wasn't even going to go try out. She told me I wasn't good enough and she didn't want me to be disappointed, yet she wouldn't let me go to my best friends' birthday party the night before because you know I had to wake up early and go to the audition. Looking back now I realized that this is the classic MO of a narcissist, to break you down right before you have something important to do or to go.

My dad woke me up the next morning to take me, but I didn't want to go. My voice was hoarse from crying all night and my eyes and face were all puffy. He told me that I deserved this opportunity because I was so talented. He, gently, convinced me to go. He drove me all the way to Manhattan and made sure he took me into the school.

There were 100's of kids from all around the country there to audition. I was there for songwriting and singing. It was a very nerve-wrecking day. When it was finally my time to audition for singing I was up on stage (it was one of the many large classrooms that was set up like a small auditorium) and listening to the teachers and judges give me direction. Just as I was about to sing, some kids in the hallway were goofing around and threw a chair up against the door and I was startled (as were the teachers). They had to go out and yell at them. But my nerves were already wrecked (I may have even been crying). My voice was so shaky that they decided it was only fair if I went to audition with the other set of judges so I had a fresh start. So I did. When it was through, I went and found my dad waiting for me and I cried and cried and cried. I told him what happened and I was so upset. But you know what, I still made into the school! It didn't matter, because my mother would not let me attend the school.

This was one of the many times in my life that my mother has stolen an opportunity of a lifetime from me. Even with all the torture and battle I still made it into the school. Yet, I still could not believe that I was talented enough.

Many years later I traveled around the country singing backup for a Christian worship band. But still could not do solos.

This past year I realized I had some sort of aversion to the word Fame and Fame in general. As I was trying to work this out, I had the experience I wrote about in this post connected to Miley's video with Naomi Campbell. https://www.skool.com/highvibetribe/welcome-to-the-other-side-of-the-looking-glass?p=19c9d031 (In this experience, I realized that I had a fear of having children even though I always wanted them. Having this epiphany made me realize that my fear of fame was so trivial compared to this fear I was carrying all my life and didn't realize it.)

Around the same time, I came across the Instagram clip of Miley talking about her EMDR experience and how she was cured of stage fright. https://www.skool.com/highvibetribe/this-is-the-process-of-multigenerational-healing?p=79d492c1

Then I heard her song "Walk of Fame" and I loved it! I've been singing this song for a few weeks now. Every now and then, I catch myself replacing the word "Fame" with "Faith" and I realized how true they both are. I've been Walking a life of Faith for a very long time, and even though I have tried to stay hidden and out of any spotlight, I have always been magnetic. Reminiscing here in the HVT I realized that I pretty much can't go anywhere without running into a celebrity or musician, it's almost like we are just drawn to each other. It's almost like, "every time I walk it's a walk of fame!"

Even though my mother has never changed, I have and these confirmations that the universe keeps sending me has broken off the fear in my life. And although I do not intend to pursue "fame" I can't help but wonder what in the world is about to happen in my life since I am no longer hindering it with my resistance!

One of the last experiences I had with my Dad (before he passed away) was that he heard me singing in the basement from two floors above me (I thought he was sleeping) and he came down the stairs and waited and listened outside my door until I was finished. He came in and told me how beautiful I sounded and came over and hugged me. I was singing, "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid. Love you daddy.❤️

How about you? Are there any songs speaking deeply to your spirit right now? Do you have any childhood dreams that have turned into fears?

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WOW, I watched this interview last night (July 18) and Miley talks about how "Walk of Fame" is her favorite song from the new album. She talks about her memories with her DAD and the emotional connection to it. And then she talks about the synchronicity that while she was working on the song she got the call that she was getting her STAR on the WALK OF FAME!

Just another serendipitous synchronicity for me too! https://youtu.be/hKS0aos2C8I?si=Oi6QPOuAGjMuEb3n

Adding La La Land to the mix. When I first made this post and watched the "Fame" video I saw a striking resemblance to the opening of the movie La La Land and the video for "Another Day of Sun." When I was a child it was always my dream to go to the beaches in Malibu and live in LA. In 2019 and again in 2021, I finally was living my dream! In 2021, I had stayed with a friend when I first arrived who lived about 45 minutes outside LA and I would drive to work in Beverly Hills every morning, listening to the La La Land soundtrack! After listening to Miley Cyrus in some of her interviews this week and her reminisces about her Dad, I took another look at this post. The side by side of Miley's "Walk of Fame" obviously in LA, and the "Fame" video, in NYC, I saw the merging of "Another Day of Sun!" From NYC to Hollywood, I will definitely get back there one day!

Update 8/5/25: So I got a phone call last night from a friend of mine that I used to have a film company with and haven't spoken to in 3 years. We talked for 4 hours. Turns out she is now a member of the Academy and has won an Oscar. I shared with her my Fame story (this post) and she proceeded to tell me that she is friends with the family and was just at the Vanity Affair event with them!

She has a few projects that she is working on and was trying to get me interested in working on them. I'm not sure yet, as I don't want to just jump into whatever comes my way. I've done that a lot in my life, living in survival mode and tend to give a lot more than I get in return. She invited me to a whole bunch of artist events here in NY, and is coming in next month (She's in LA) to attend one of them out in the Hamptons. So I might go out to that one just to dip my toes in the water.

I don't know whether to take this as a synchronicity or whether to proceed with caution. There was some stuff that I had let slide in the past, even though she made me aware that a whole bunch of our "friends" in the industry basically ostracized and blacklisted me because they did not agree with my beliefs. On one had I loved that we talked for 4 hours as if the last 3 years didn't happen, but on the other hand I was very heartbroken last night and today just thinking about how people can be so cruel. How I was fighting for my life between 2021-2024 and people who were supposed to be my friends were wishing me ill. I'm a bit overwhelmed and heartbroken today.

Walk of Fame

https://youtu.be/JX2GkxNT-IQ?si=D-lKO4TU2ngaDeid

Fame (there was a film and TV show about the school) - This used to be one of my go to karaoke songs

https://youtu.be/H1gMQ_q3FSM?si=3KpfeSyG

Another Day of Sun - La La Land

https://youtu.be/xVVqlm8Fq3Y?si=M4QflxZpFg2-pOvk

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