Identity Shifting, is there a date this happens or am I always in mid-process?

6 months of this Year flew pretty darn quick! for Me it's been a wild roller coaster on multiple matters of the Mind, Body, Spirit and Heart. It's been a real doozy especially with Identity shifting, wondering still, is there a date I finally reach waking up to become what I want to be or am I always in mid-process?

While One can wake up to find they aren't who They want to be, They either accept their fate or choose to make the change with whatever time they have.

I'm a firm believer that Tomorrow guarantees no one, It's how We frame it that it becomes to feel like a gift not a curse, See, Now is the Youngest You'll ever be, so the times have past, things didn't go as planned, yet here You are with an opportunity to make due with what You have and turn over a new leaf.

Video Gamers would call it New Game+ all the EXP, insights, hows and how not toos but it stops there as reality always holds uncertainty Scripted Games do not, This is coming from a Over-thinking Strategic thinker over-planner whose now gone from dodging every catastrophe or pitfall, to waking up in one too many and now working on Execution and successfully implementing beautifully and astonshingly effectively, using the Courage, inner bravery and Psychopathic Confidence Courses by the legendary Dan Munro in that order to work up the nerve to act on the impulse through uncertainty phobic manic episodes and begin the identity shift by creating the evidence for My Information hoarding Mind to pick up and file as certainty

The shift from being complacent dressed as acceptance due to assurances from dodgy General practitioners who fancy Themselves as Liver specialists that spiralled into bloodwork coming back bonkers!! (no fatty liver isn't normal like I was told and continued to a few weeks ago by a GP who looked like My Dead Dickhead Grandpa and left My condition unchecked for 9 bloody years I won't get back until I reversed it and got My Metabolism healthy again)

That has since changed, upon reflection, It mainly happened upon Me going through the 8 phases of grief ( I know there's 5, but from Work Training, research and 6 months visits with a Psychologist, 8 was comprehensive.):

Shock

Denial

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Testing

Acceptance

Acknowledging

Meaning

It was there I underwent the beginning process of true Identity shifting After going through (and still am) this entire 8 level Dante's Divine Comedyesque Emotional process over the course of 3 days and doing so completely shut off of Electronics and food fasted as a way to gain some groundedness having My Mind spinning in circles and kicking Myself endlessly for the time I had to reverse the condition by my own volition yet didn't due to other mental health struggles I was processing with a Nervous System still recovering from over 2 decades of untreated Sleep Apnea no Human in My age category either died or became severely mentally challenged.

I knew at the end of the reset that the person who could reverse his Condition was already doing what I had started to implement, not researching or planning like I was about invade the Middle-east for fucks sake, This Person would first frame denial not as being depraved but being rewarded, second Exercise not as Punishment as I was taught by My Father for being Fat due to stresses He, Family, Community, School and Sleep Apnea caused but as liberation as Medicine as shedding the old not with shame but with love!

Physical Health restored, I now am working on My second Goal for the Year, bringing Order to My Financial Pillar of life, using what I know, with what I have, where I am, however I can, This will require another aspect of My Identity to Shift, so long as the Work can be done meaningfully, I'm too tired of working a dead end job for Money alone, I even decline a 75k a year Job offer while home studying and unemployed simply because I didn't want to deal with dishonest people and the headaches They bring for not paying up for Their won Auction at the Fish Market.

Honestly This old shell of a self Shedding began long ago, often times I cut too deep then backing off, reset and continue to leave what wasn't serving Me with gratitude.

If Who I was when I was first being treated for sleep Apnea 11 years would look at Me Now and wonder, " How the Hell do You not feel shame, obligations, keeping appearances, worry about what He, She, They/Them, How/Ever and Was/When perceive Me, let alone the way You go about You current day?"

I would say " Shame for whom? someone elses distorted perception and judgement, Values imposed They don't completely believe in yet find purpose imposing it, appearances for People on Donkeys masquerading as High Horses and Every Soul who simply is a shamed of Themselves for not giving Themselves the chance to do for Me what they could do for themselves and benefit."

Worrying about the time that passes is a waste of the Time that passes. I don't know long I have left to live, I maybe extending it with an identity shift that allows Me to make healthy choices like it was an indulgence with perks rather than a deprivation for momentary gratification.

I choose to optimize Myself without making My identity centered around constant optimization as I did for the last 17 Years of information hoarding and limited implementation My Younger self.

I look back with kind Eyes at that Sleep deprived, Brain damaged, Emotionally damaged Young Adult attempting to understand the infinitum of His own Subconscious seeking throughout what was always within reflected throughout as I always came to realise that learning had the same sensation as remembering, that what I needed to know when I needed to know happened in perfect synchronicity while living in the moment, in the mid-process of it all, making perfect use with the time I have like now, fulfilled even burning past 3 hours and 25 minutes past the midnight Oil here in Australia.

How does Your experience with Identity shifting in the face of uncertainty work for You?

“The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.”

Jack london

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Identity Shifting, is there a date this happens or am I always in mid-process?