Today was another really engaging call. A couple of things that stood out for me: The Life Values Survey challenged a lot of the usual generational stereotypes. It suggested that things like work ethic are tied more to where people are in life right now than to what generation they’re labeled as. Also, in mediation, if someone gets hostile, the idea isn’t to call them out or shut them down. Instead, go back to the ground rules set at the beginning and affect label what they’re feeling.

I purchased a prescription from a local pharmacy and paid extra to have it delivered. According to the USPS tracking number, it was supposed to be delivered on January 9th, but I never received it. The USPS website still shows the package as “out for delivery.” I called the pharmacy, and they told me it was my responsibility to contact the post office. I replied that I thought it would be good customer service for them to help track it down. At that point, the conversation became heated. I don’t recall the exact words the other person used, but the tone was tense. I paused and said, “You don’t think this makes sense.” His tone softened slightly, and he replied, “I guess I look at things through a different lens.” I said, “Thank you,” and the call ended.

We’ve all done it. A student is melting down, and we say, "Take a breath and calm down." Suddenly, they're screaming louder. In the comments below, share one phrase you used to think was "helpful" but now realize was actually invalidating. I’ll start: "I understand how you feel." (It’s a lie. You don’t, and they know it).

The "98/2 Axiom" states that humans are 98% emotional and only 2% rational. Think of your toughest client or family member. When they spiral, do you try to talk to the 2% (facts) or the 98% (feelings)? Be honest. We mostly try to "fix" it with the 2%. How does that usually go for you?

We all have that moment. We used the "textbook" response—active listening, "I statements," holding space—and the client just got angrier. What was the technique? What happened? Share your horror story below. No judgment, just data.