@Matt Eppy right! My younger self would steer clear of danger if it knew. I too have been some shit. I don't regret it actually - I'm forever grateful of who I am in through and spite of it all.

@Jared Horrocks forgiveness is huge! It's a permission that I give to myself - that I don't have to carry that burden. I wish you well in this endeavor.

I have another bit to add. Heavy is different for each of us just as much as it can be similar to others’ struggles. Heavy sucks for real. Heavy requires strength doesn’t it. You just don’t have it. You’re worn and weak. Whether the heavy has just been there accumulating for a while - or if it’s a sudden weight and burden… you need to catch a break. Your mind, emotions, and body need rest. I start feeding those needs at the most basic level. One tip I have started using comes from the chaos of a military mission fully engaged in battle and suffering. They teach to get back from mission and not to talk or begin debriefing. Run the final stage of the mission first. And that is to unload the gear, clean your equipment and put things in order. Then get cleaned up. I use this myself in simple ways. The stresser is happening and so I pick an end point for what I’m doing and I commit to myself to see it through just to that point. Put it down and do so in an orderly fashion so that the next time I restart it - I’m not cleaning up the mess I left from that time when I was stressed. The key here is to define the newly established commitment. Measure and cut the last board Hang the last piece Deliver the last load Fuel up and park the truck for the night Put the tools away and sweep up Whatever you’re doing… bring it to completion. You get to take with you the satisfaction of having finished it to that point. And tomorrow when you pick it up - thank your yester-self for a clean tool a clean shop or a full tank of gas. You achieved your goal. Mission Accomplished

@Jared Horrocks you had that "heavy" this week. It messed up your work day and almost poured over into family. We're vulnerable to it for sure. Good for you in capturing that reality and moving past it.

@Jeff Van Dam love it

Let's call this place The Man Market. lol, that's just it though - it's men showing up for themselves. We are building a new world and the best ones find places like this.

@Matt Eppy you know - with breathing techniques I intentionally do not do any significant breathing in response to situations. I find that this decision to restrict has removed a crutch from my mind. I used to respond with a sigh which meant a ton of things to me on the inside. It allowed me to disengage when instead I should remain on game. I understand the value in taking deep slow breaths and the benefit it gives me by calming me down. After having restricted the use of the crutch and getting great results in doing so - I am needing to implement some breathing intention again where it's more appropriate.

@Matt Eppy ha ha yes - sigh is breathing but for me it was a life-long developed habit of "not-so-good" behaviors: giving up giving in getting mad withholding comment refusing to engage further A sigh signaled an unhealthy turning point. So for me I cut it out for the higher goal of learning and offering a better me that shows up for others.