Sports scorekeeping is great. Business scorekeeping is great. Both are designed and intended to deliver results, Winners & Losers. But for you and I this cannot be how we measure results and progress. Comparison is the thief of joy. We are now more than ever surrounded by opportunity via comparison. Ads are just comparisons and are very effective in sales. You are not a product to be sold. Why do you sell yourself the result that someone else has gotten without also putting in the exact work to go toward it? Do you even know how much work they put in? Do you realize that it will never be the same for them as it is for you. You might actually stand a better chance than they did. But you sit and keep score and make no progress. Let’s go somewhere a little more hidden and not so obvious. You can write down in the comments whichever less obvious thing that you hide or used to hide. The thing you minimize because it sucks. The thing you do in private because it contradicts all your public goals. We’ve all seen the diet ad where the husband and wife sneak off to a closet to hid and eat a snack and then find out that they went to the same closet. Then we feel the ad reminding us its ok - and we laugh about it because they designed the ad for entertainment. Some of that is real and yet the world of business uses it so lightly. - The fear you have of not measuring up in one of a thousand possible examples - so you hide it. - Fear of abandonment and watching others be loved. - Fear of failure - The action in trying just feels like failure so you don’t act. - Rejection - being told no and taking it personally. - Criticism and coaching intended to be helpful causes more shutting down and seclusion. - Showing up where people are gathered makes you nervous because on the inside you’re a mess so you stop showing up. - After a long time of wanting to be invited and then telling yourself a lie repeatedly - you do get the invite and you say you can’t go because it wouldn’t be right for you with your issues to show up with everyone else enjoying themselves… that you’d just be a burden.

For the longest time, I wondered what it really meant to forgive someone you no longer talk to. I used to think forgiveness required a conversation, an apology, an explanation, or some kind of final moment between two people. Maybe I thought I needed the other person to understand what happened before I could truly let it go. But I’ve learned that forgiveness doesn’t always require another person. Sometimes, forgiveness is something you quietly do for yourself. Last evening, I met up with an old friend who, at one point in my life, wasn’t the best friend to me. There was unnecessary turmoil, conflict, and a lot of emotions surrounding that period of our lives. It wasn’t easy. There were things that hurt, things I didn’t understand, and feelings that took time to process. And yet, somehow, more than a decade later, we have remained in touch. Over the years, the relationship became cordial. There was no longer the same intensity or closeness, but there was respect. Sitting across from each other over coffee and ice cream, I realized something. I had forgiven them. Not because what happened didn’t matter. Not because I suddenly believed everything that happened was okay. And certainly not because I had forgotten. I had forgiven them because I no longer wanted to carry it. There is a difference between remembering something and living inside of it. I can acknowledge that I could have been difficult at times. I can own my mistakes and the ways I contributed to situations. But I also recognize how much I’ve grown since then. I’m proud of the person I’ve become and, particularly, proud that I can sit in a difficult conversation without allowing old emotions to take control of me. What surprised me was realizing that my old friend may still be carrying some of those feelings. There were questions about why things happened the way they did. Questions about the past. Questions that, in some ways, I had already stopped asking myself a long time ago. My response was simple. I’m not mad.

Alright boys, this Saturday morning we’ve got my good friend Matt Vincent joining us for the call. I know a bunch of you already know him, but for anyone who doesn’t, he’s a Highland Games World Champion, author, business owner, creator of the Not Dead Yet Community, and just an all-around interesting dude who’s lived a lot of life and has a lot to say. NDY is actually how Matt and I first connected almost five years ago, so I’m pretty pumped to finally have him come hang out with us inside Anchored & Ready. This isn’t going to be some formal interview where I fire questions at him for an hour. I want it to be a conversation, so come prepared. If there’s something you want to ask Matt about training, business, getting older, reinvention, building community, life after competing, or whatever else comes up, bring it. Saturday. 7:00 AM Pacific. I think this one’s going to be a damn good call. See you boys there. :::

How much truth you can handle about yourself dictates success…? Is that a real thing? What are the gifts of that perspective?

A little update on Anchored and Ready. A while back, I said this community would be switching to paid. That didn’t happen. At the time, I thought I was ready to make that move. Looking back, I’m glad I didn’t force it because I was still figuring out what this community was actually supposed to become. I knew what I wanted it to stand for. I just didn’t have enough direction yet. That’s changed. Over the last little while, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how I want to rebuild this community, what I want men to actually get from being here, and what would make this worth showing up for month after month. So October is the start of the next version of Anchored and Ready. It’ll be built around four main areas: Foundation — Build Your Base Sleep, movement, routines, journaling, breathwork and taking care of yourself properly. Performance — Operate Better Pressure, focus, priorities, distractions and how you handle the load you’re carrying. Relationships — Show Up Better Fatherhood, marriage, friendship, hard conversations, presence and being there for the people who matter. Identity — Know What You’re Building Who you are, what needs to change, what you’re carrying and what kind of life you actually want to build. You’ll start seeing more structure around those areas. Coffee & Clarity stays. There’ll be more regular check-ins and accountability, monthly themes and challenges, guest conversations and more practical resources added to the Classroom. I’m also going to start building out standalone courses and 30/60-day programs for guys who want to go deeper into a specific area and actually work through something from start to finish. And I’ll be adding a monthly 1-on-1 coaching option for a small number of men who want more direct support, accountability and personal guidance. Those will be separate from the regular community membership and completely optional. I don’t want this to turn into another place where guys collect information and never do anything with it.