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5 contributions to How To Self Coach Your Nafs ?
New Course Now Live | Open to the Community
Alhamdulillah 🌷 The new course has been uploaded and is now accessible to everyone in the community. SELF SABOTAGING EMOTIONAL BLOCKS This course gently explores the patterns that quietly hold us back — with space for awareness, reflection, and steady growth. No rush. No pressure. Take it at your own pace. You can access the course here: 🔗 https://www.skool.com/how-to-self-coach-your-nafs-4445/classroom/87575bec May this be a means of insight, healing, and barakah for whoever enters it. Aameen 🤲
New Course Now Live | Open to the Community
1 like • 7h
Ameen
Attachment, Power & Our Hidden Patterns
السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته I want to open a gentle, honest discussion — not to label anyone, but to understand ourselves better. From my own journey, I’ve realised something important: Sometimes, the same person can show people-pleasing in one relationship and narcissistic tendencies in another. __________________________________________________ For example: - With someone who feels controlling or emotionally unavailable, we may shrink, over-explain, and people-please. - With someone who feels clingy or emotionally dependent, we may inflate, withdraw warmth, or feel subtly superior. Both responses often come from the same place: 👉 a need to feel safe, not a desire to harm. __________________________________________________ This helped me see that: - Narcissism is often a pattern, not a permanent identity. - Attachment wounds can change how we show up, depending on power dynamics. - Healing isn’t about blame — it’s about awareness and responsibility. __________________________________________________ 🔎Reflection🔍 • Have you ever noticed yourself changing roles across different relationships? • Where do you think people-pleasing or emotional withdrawal shows up for you? • What helped you move toward dignity and balance? There are no right or wrong answers here. Every journey is unique. This is a space for reflection, not judgment. __________________________________________________ If this reflection resonated with you, feel free to share your thoughts — your insight might help someone else recognize their own pattern with compassion. Bi idn Illah.
Attachment, Power & Our Hidden Patterns
1 like • 1d
Assalamu Alykum. I have definitely noticed myself changing roles across different relationships. The one that comes to the forefront of my mind is the relationship between my mother and husband. People pleasing shows up or at least used to show up for me in family gatherings. After I accepted Islam, I have been putting in effort to work on this. Alhamdulillah Islam helped me move toward dignity and balance 🥰
2 likes • 1d
@Umm Salman Subhanallah! That’s one of my favorite ayats in the Quran! I remind myself of this when I’m scared of an outcome. I also, remind my daughters of this often 🫂 Ameen
Course Uploaded - Understanding Discipline.
Many of you came here asking one question in different forms: “Why do I know what is right… but fail to stay consistent?” I’ve opened a classroom called “Understanding Discipline” It is about training the nafs with clarity and mercy. Module 1 and 2 is ready. You can enter slowly. No pressure to finish. This is for those who want to become steady, not impressive. Posting the link here. https://www.skool.com/how-to-self-coach-your-nafs-4445/classroom/1cb9b427
Course Uploaded  - Understanding Discipline.
0 likes • 3d
@Umm Salman I’m not sure I understand the question sister.
1 like • 3d
@Umm Salman Puerto Rico
When Parents Are Emotionally Dependent on Us
Amina loved her mother deeply. Every day, her phone lit up with messages. Some were simple — “Did you eat?” Some were heavy — “I feel so lonely today.” Some carried quiet expectation — “You’re the only one who understands me.” Amina listened. Always. She reassured. Explained. Comforted. Adjusted her schedule. And slowly, without realizing it, she began to feel tired in a way sleep didn’t fix. After every call, her chest felt tight. She felt guilty for wanting space… and guilty again for feeling resentful. One evening, after a particularly long conversation, Amina sat quietly with herself and asked: “Why do I feel like I disappear every time I try to be a good daughter?” She wasn’t angry at her mother. She wasn’t ungrateful. She just felt… drained. That night, a realization settled softly in her heart: My mother loves me. But somewhere along the way, I became her emotional anchor instead of Allah. This thought scared her at first. Then it freed her. The next day, Amina didn’t withdraw. She didn’t become cold. She didn’t start setting harsh boundaries. She simply changed how she showed up. When her mother called in distress, Amina listened — but she didn’t rush to solve. She validated the feeling, then gently said: “Let’s make duʿā together.” When complaints repeated, Amina stayed calm — not absorbed. She reminded herself: Compassion does not mean carrying what is not mine. She reduced urgency, not love. Presence, not respect. Slowly, something shifted. Her mother began pausing before calling. She started finding comfort in prayer, in routine, in other relationships. Not because Amina abandoned her — but because Amina returned her reliance back to Allah. And Amina? She felt lighter. She was still a dutiful daughter. But now, she was also whole. She learned that: - Honouring parents does not mean emotional self-erasure - Balance is not distance — it is regulated closeness - And sometimes, the most loving thing you can dois refuse to replace Allah in someone’s heart
When Parents Are Emotionally Dependent on Us
1 like • 6d
Ameen!
Grateful for this space and community 🩵
Over the last two days, I intentionally stepped back a little — not because I had nothing to say, but to make space for your voices. Reading your reflections, outlooks, and concerns has been deeply meaningful. This community is not meant to be a one-way sharing space. It is a place where each voice matters. Your questions, your struggles, your perspectives — they all add depth and life to this space. Please continue to post, reflect, and respond to one another. You don’t need perfect words. You just need honesty. Thank you for trusting this space and showing up. May Allah put barakah in every sincere word shared here 🤍
Grateful for this space and community 🩵
0 likes • 10d
Ameen 🫂 ❤️
1-5 of 5
Kenyi Gelaev
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@kenyi-gelaev-7489
From Him I came, for Him I was born, by Him I live, and to Him I shall return. Behold the might of Allah.

Active 7h ago
Joined Jan 8, 2026
NJ, USA