I think we all saw the video and u can find it on YouTube. My main Question is how, at some point, after the initial non-rationale response do you actually explain there is a nail in the head? Or is the point to just to de-escalate?

Most of us have unwarranted entitlement expectations from our significant others. No one helped us connect the dots that, as adults, we cannot expect others to meet our unstated needs. We need to ask for them to met. More importantly, we need to be willing to accept “No” for an answer without blaming or shaming our partner. Relationship negotiation doesn’t sound very romantic or sexy, but it is the foundation of lasting love. Without strong, conscious relationship negotiating skills, couples are bound for conflict, fighting, and frustration. Here are four principles of relationship negotiation. Relationship Negotiation Principle 1: Fairness Is What You Create, Not What You Deserve Many people believe that life is supposed to be fair. If “the rules” are followed, if we eat our vegetables, if we are nice, and work hard, somehow we will be rewarded for our goodness. In relationships, the myth is if I am nice, loving, kind, and affectionate, my partner will do the same for me. Sadly, this myth is a lie told to us in childhood to make us behave like good little children. Life is not fair, and you are not entitled to fairness. There, I said it. If you want to be treated fairly, you have to work at it. Fairness is not some gift bestowed by your fairy godmother. On other hand, a good life is not about grabbing everything you can for yourself to the exclusion of everyone else. That’s not fair either, to you or to those around you. There has to be a balance, and balance is created through relationship negotiation. Fairness is what you create, not what you think you are entitled to because you are good person. Principle 2: You Have to Ask for What You Want As infants and small children, we could not ask for what we needed. We could only make a lot of noise to get someone’s attention. It was up to someone else to figure out whether we needed a diaper change or a bottle. Miraculously, Mom or Dad appeared and took care of us. While we learned to negotiate many other aspects of our lives as adults, we were not taught how to ask for what we needed and wanted in relationships. Instead, we carry a belief our unspoken needs that our partner will instantly recognize and satisfy us.

Tom, a senior engineer, interrupted the strategy meeting with a sharp jab. “This plan is going to fail. No one asked the people doing the actual work.” The VP, Derek, had the data. The analysis was solid. The projections were airtight. He could’ve defended it. Argued. Pushed back. But instead, he paused and said, “You’re frustrated. You feel ignored. Maybe even a little insulted.” Tom blinked. Then nodded. “Yeah. That’s exactly it.” No raised voices. No escalation. Just a team back on track. This is affect labeling—the most counterintuitive leadership skill you were never taught. 🧠 It calms anger in seconds.🎯 It restores trust without giving up authority.🧩 And it solves the real problem—emotional tension disguised as disagreement. Being right won’t stop conflict. Listening to emotion will. Who on your team is waiting for you to understand what they feel, not what they say?

This video will help you if you are lonely and isolated in your relationship.

What's your gut reaction to this video? I'm producing a bunch of them and am wondering how they are landing?