Your child isn't giving you a hard time. They're having a hard time. When a child who has experienced trauma melts down, shuts down, or lashes out. That's not defiance. That's a nervous system that learned to protect itself. That hypervigilance at bedtime? It kept them safe once. That explosive reaction to a small change? Unpredictability used to be dangerous. That refusal to make eye contact? Sometimes being seen meant being targeted. These aren't behaviors to punish. They're survival strategies that haven't gotten the memo that things are different now. What helps: 🤎 Predictability over perfection 🤎 Connection before correction 🤎 Naming what you see without judgment "Your body seems really activated right now" 🤎 Regulating yourself first so they can borrow your calm Healing doesn't happen through consequences. It happens through safety …repeated, boring, consistent safety. You don't have to be a perfect parent. You just have to be a safe one. #childtrauma #traumainformed #parentingafttrauma #childhoodtrauma #traumarecovery #regulationbeforereason #nervousystemhealing #riseframework #survivalintelligence #healingfamilies

Language is important!

“Hypervigilance isn’t anxiety. It’s a security system that was installed by someone who needed it. The problem isn’t that you’re broken. The problem is you’re still running combat software in a peacetime environment. You’re not anxious. You’re highly trained for a threat that no longer exists.” #ptsdrecovery #trauma #militaryveterans #veteransupport #domesticviolenceawareness

There has been a death in my family. I will be back later today to post my daily post. Hope it's okay to post this.

Workbook for nervous system regulation