Attachment in the Therapy Room: It's Not Just About Our Clients

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Today in Therapist Community TPS we are exploring the topic of attachment in the therapy room.

Many of us are familiar with attachment theory and routinely consider a client's attachment style when formulating their difficulties.

But perhaps a more challenging question is:

What happens when we consider our own attachment style in the therapy room?

Attachment patterns do not disappear simply because we become therapists.

For example:

🌱 A therapist with more anxious attachment tendencies may find themselves over-functioning, worrying excessively about clients, or struggling when clients disengage.

🌱 A therapist with more avoidant tendencies may feel discomfort around dependency, emotional intensity, or prolonged therapeutic relationships.

🌱 Therapists with attachment trauma may notice strong countertransference responses when particular client presentations resonate with their own experiences.

None of this is pathology.

It is simply being human.

Attachment is not only something our clients bring into the room. It is something that exists between therapist and client, co-created through the therapeutic relationship itself.

The therapeutic alliance often becomes a living attachment experience where expectations, fears, relational patterns, and protective strategies emerge in real time.

💭 Reflection Question:

When you think about your own attachment style, how do you see it showing up in your work as a therapist, counsellor, or coach?

If you want to join in the conversation in more detail, join us for free today Therapist Community TPS

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