Lately as some of you have heard me on the calls I've been having some difficulties getting embodied and witnessing. I'd say these emotions were tricking me, I was attaching! Confused, scared, no confidence. Inner dialogue was confused, doubtful, and I was attaching to all of it. I had a realization during todays session, got deep down into what I think was a pivotal moment for me. I saw an embarrassed Nick, 5th grade, doing a pretend job interview as part of a class assignment. There were kids parents on campus holding interviews and I chose a construction worker career path because I thought that was the easy way out, no education needed, not much thought or homework required... I thought I would skate through it, and of course I didn't. I didn't even get the job, I failed the assignment! All these emotions set in, and I felt defeated for a long time after that, "I'm not smart enough for college. Oh that requires a degree? I'll pass. I'm too lazy. I should've repeated grade school, my parents are always so frustrated when I ask for help. I shouldn't need this much help." I had dropped the dreams, the intuition, and I watched from the outside. Look at everyone around me so driven, continued education with degrees, I'll just work an easy job that I can tolerate and let my free time be my life, "work to live not live to work". I have settled for far too long! Here's a quote from Pink Floyd, I use to be on the side of the coin that felt that too much time had passed, and that I was too late. Never in my life did I think I would be where I am today. I settled, gave up on too much and tried to absolutely burry that feeling of being too stupid or lazy, distracted or incapable. But I'm feeling reborn at 34, and in control. Time " You are young and life is long, and there is time to kill today. And then one day you find ten years have got behind you. No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun".

The FAQ section of the classroom is filled with recordings of our weekly calls. There is lots of value for everyone there, those at the start of the journey and those refining their process. It's also great to know that everyone faces challenges in this work and if you reach out within the community someone can help you. Link below https://www.skool.com/the-lighthouse-project/classroom/852281d5?md=1746c27819ec454f90749893455e7f7b

https://youtu.be/IY9v3qRnuYE?si=gZgslzMXX6vLwUuf For those of you who have not scene the classic comedy Office Space, this is how the movie starts.

I have tried to do some inner child work, or IFS work, or... well, it seems similar to what I'm hearing here from Andrew. I don't have any problem with this foundationally. But I have had difficulty accessing my own buried selves and getting to the roots. I'm going to keep at it. One thing I am willing to work on is my FOMO. I sometimes commit to things I have no space AT ALL for, because I don't want to "miss out." I can feel it in my chest and down into my upper abdomen, this feeling. I'm ready. Stepping forward.

I'm delighted to announce that the film we made in November last year is finished and ready to launch to the public. I'd like to say a special thanks to everyone that was vulnerable enough to share their stories - @Ben Valdovinos @Andrew Rotter @Bryant Goodall @Nick Valdovinos @Sam Johnson @Patrick Camman and to the talented team that made the film - @Marcus Ubungen @Donavan Sell This work can life changing for everyone that goes through the pain and comes out the other side. You guys are the first to see it. Please watch and let us know what you think. Watch link - https://youtu.be/4ldWtO4-Cm8