15d • 💬 General discussion
Field Report from Medellin, Colombia
I went on a solo trip to Medellin, Colombia for 10 days. Here's my report.
Open to your feedback!
✅ Wins
- Arrived knowing almost no one and left having met 100+ people, forming multiple overlapping social circles
- Built strong social momentum by the end of the trip — comfortably opening dozens of people in a single night
- Invited to perform at a rooftop jam session for ~200 people (major social proof moment)
- Integrated into several communities: musicians, salsa dancers, language exchange groups, coffee tour groups
- Built a strong alliance with one key male friend and helped generate high-energy group dynamics consistently
- Noticeable improvement in vocal projection, posture, eye contact, and overall presence throughout the trip
- Stayed highly present by minimizing social media and prioritizing real-world interactions
- Successfully isolated a woman and led a venue change home (strong logistical leadership, even without a close)
- Consistently created comfort and connection in new groups — natural social glue
⚠️ Challenges
Hesitation to Approach: Saw opportunities but held back at times due to assumption of low interest.
Underestimating Attractiveness: Missed or rationalized away signs of interest (eye contact, proximity, engagement).
Fear of Making Women Uncomfortable: Defaulted to safe/friendly energy rather than allowing interactions to become man-to-woman.
Overreliance on Conversation: Tried to build connection verbally instead of leading physically or logistically.
Late Escalation: Attraction peaked earlier than action was taken in multiple interactions.
Early-Trip Confidence Dips: Lower vocal strength and internal certainty affected presence at the beginning of the trip.
📚 Lessons
- Attraction often exists earlier than you think
- Waiting for certainty = loss of momentum
- Physical leading communicates intent more clearly than verbal explanation
- Emotional momentum matters more than long conversations
- Confidence shows up as decisiveness, not just loudness
- Social proof (performer + connector role) significantly amplifies attraction
- You thrive in socially warm, activity-based environments
🔑 Key Sticking Point
Hesitation to transition from friendly/social energy → romantic/sexual intent without explicit verbal confirmation.
🔄 Adjustments for Next Time
- Assume baseline attraction when receiving sustained eye contact, proximity, and engagement
- Escalate physically in-venue: light touch, hand leads, sitting side-by-side, dancing
- Move interactions forward through location changes rather than deeper conversation
- Shorten the time between meeting and isolation
- Replace the instinct to “talk more” with the instinct to lead somewhere
🎯 Key Interaction Breakdowns
🎸 Musician Social Circle
What Went Well
- Bonded over music and was invited into a high-value social setting
- Performance created strong social proof and visibility
What Held Me Back
- Confidence dipped around the established friend group
- Maintained a platonic frame despite signs of openness
Upgrade
- Hold man-to-woman framing even in high-status or socially intimidating environments
- Introduce flirtation earlier when the vibe is present
Outcome
- Strong social expansion
- No romantic progression
💃 Salsa Night Interaction
What Went Well
- Strong signs of interest (questions, eye contact, repeated engagement)
- Shared multiple social experiences
- Contact info secured
What Held Me Back
- Didn’t escalate while attraction was highest
- Talked instead of leading physically
- Missed the same-night logistics window
Upgrade
- Use dance and touch to build intimacy early
- Lead logistics the same night when momentum is strong
Outcome
- Clear attraction
- No follow-through
🌙 Final Night Interaction
What Went Well
- Strong eye contact and emotional tension
- Successfully isolated from the group
- Led venue change home
- Built physical comfort in private
What Held Me Back
- Escalation began too late (after leaving venue)
- Doubt slowed decisiveness
- Emotional connection didn’t transition into physical escalation soon enough
Upgrade
- Begin physical escalation inside the venue
- Go for the kiss when tension peaks
- Trust momentum instead of waiting for certainty
Outcome
- Went home together
- No physical close
- Still a positive, connected experience
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Field Report from Medellin, Colombia
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