Hard Conversations:Addiction in the Family P2

This is one of the most delicate conversations a parent can have.

Because you are trying to do two things at once tell the truth AND protect your child's love for someone.

Those two things can coexist. Here is how.

First — separate the person from the disease.

"You know how sometimes people get sick and their body does things they can't control? Addiction is like that but it affects the brain. It makes a person feel like they cannot stop even when they want to. It is not because they don't love you. It is because they are sick and they need help."

Second — validate what they have seen.

"I know you have noticed some things. You are not imagining it and you are not crazy. What you are seeing is real. And it is okay to have big feelings about it."

Third — protect them from responsibility.

"This is not your fault. You did not cause it and you cannot fix it. Your job is just to be a kid. The adults are working on this."

Fourth — give them somewhere to bring their feelings.

"If you ever feel scared or confused or angry about any of this come to me. You do not have to figure this out alone."

Fifth — bring God into it.

"We are praying for them. God loves them and so do we. And love does not mean pretending everything is okay it means we keep showing up and we keep praying."

You do not have to have a perfect answer. You just have to have an open door.

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Hard Conversations:Addiction in the Family P2