3d • Meditate
A Christmas Insight: Remembering Where Joy Truly Comes From
At this time of year, when the world is busy, bright, and full of expectation, I feel called to share one of my earliest awakening insights, an experience that quietly shaped the path that eventually led me to teaching.
Christmas has a way of amplifying both joy and longing. We gather, we give, we remember, we hope. And beneath all of that activity, many of us feel a quieter question stirring: Where does real peace come from?
For a long time, spiritual insights were kept private, spoken about only in small circles. Teachers often shared methods and teachings, while their own lived experiences remained in the background. That is slowly changing, and I believe that’s a gift.
When we speak honestly about what unfolds on an inner path, it offers reassurance, especially at a time of year when so many hearts are tender. This reflection is offered in that spirit.
The Setting: Stillness at the End of a Retreat
This experience took place around 17–18 years ago, during the final days of a meditation retreat in Derbyshire.
It wasn’t Christmas, but the feeling was familiar, the same sense we sometimes touch in the quiet moments of the festive season. Life was simple. The outer world felt far away. There was space to breathe.
As the retreat drew to a close, I noticed something subtle. Part of me was looking forward to returning home, back to my ordinary life. And at the same time, I felt deeply content right where I was.
There was appreciation, warmth, and happiness, but no clinging.
This is important. Christmas often highlights the difference between presence and grasping. Joy doesn’t disappear when we stop holding on; in fact, it often deepens.
From Gentle Contentment to a Deeper Joy
I began my meditation resting in that gentle, quiet happiness.
As the mind settled and thoughts softened, this background warmth began to grow, not because I was imagining anything pleasant or trying to feel joyful, but because the inner noise was falling away.
What emerged was a deep, steady joy. Not the excitement of unwrapping gifts or the anticipation of reunion, but something more like a soft inner glow.
This joy:
Felt deeper and more stable than festive excitement
Was not dependent on anything happening or arriving
Remained present without effort
Seemed to arise from stillness itself
Like all experiences, it passed. But the insight it carried stayed.
The Christmas Insight: Joy Is Already Here
In that moment, something became unmistakably clear:
True joy does not come from circumstances, it arises from within.
It was obvious that:
The mind holds a natural capacity for joy, often overlooked.
This inner joy is more reliable than the happiness we attach to plans, people, or outcomes
External moments, meals, gatherings, rituals, don’t create joy, but can reveal what is already present
Christmas points to this truth again and again. The candles, the music, the quiet rituals, they don’t manufacture peace. They invite us to slow down enough to feel it.
Looking Outward, Looking Inward
From childhood, many of us are taught, especially at this time of year, to look outward for happiness:
The perfect day
The perfect gathering
The perfect gift
The perfect feeling
And when it passes, we can feel the familiar ache.
This experience revealed another way:
Outward focus: “When everything is just right, I’ll feel at peace.”
Inward focus: “What happens if I meet this moment fully, just as it is?”
That quiet reorientation changed everything.
Cultivating Inner Stillness During the Festive Season
You don’t need a retreat to touch this quality of joy, Christmas itself can become a doorway.
1. Create Small Islands of Stillness
Even five minutes of quiet matters.
Step outside, sit by the tree lights, or pause before the day begins.
Let the nervous system soften.
2. Practise Non-Clinging Joy
Enjoy the warmth, the food, the laughter without needing it to last.
Joy doesn’t disappear when we stop holding it; it becomes more spacious.
3. Return to the Body and Breath
When things feel overwhelming, come back to the simplicity of breathing.
Presence is the greatest gift you can give yourself.
4. Let Joy Arise Naturally
Don’t try to feel “Christmassy.”
Peace arrives when we stop demanding it.
5. Reflect Gently
When you do feel moments of warmth or connection, ask softly:
Is this joy coming from the moment—or from my own openness to it?
Why I Share This at Christmas
This early insight, and many that followed, is what eventually led me to guide others.
Not to persuade.
Not to fix.
But to remind.
Especially at Christmas, when so many people feel both love and loneliness, fullness and exhaustion, this reminder matters:
You are not broken for wanting peace.
And you don’t have to wait for everything to be perfect to feel it.
That is why I offer mentoring, not as a requirement, but as an invitation for those who feel the quiet nudge to turn inward.
A Christmas Reminder
This season carries a simple teaching:
What you are seeking is already closer than you think.
To remember:
Deep joy is not something to earn or arrange
Stillness is available, even in busy days
Joy is a quality of presence, not performance
Awakening often comes as a gentle remembering
Turning inward is an act of kindness
If this reflection meets you at the right moment, let it be a soft pause amid the festivities.
Breathe.
Soften.
Come home to yourself.
The light you’re looking for this Christmas has always been within you. ✨🎄
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A Christmas Insight: Remembering Where Joy Truly Comes From
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