In response to @Ali Santiago And thank you for trusting me with this because I want you to know — what you are describing is one of the most common experiences I hear from women who are spiritually gifted and also just trying to survive life at the same time. You have not lost your gift. Life just got loud. Think about it this way. When you were a child your mind was free. You were operating mostly from a place of imagination, openness, and receiving. Children live in that space naturally — they haven't yet been handed the weight of bills, work schedules, responsibilities, and the mental load that comes with being a functioning adult. That openness is exactly why so many of us could see, hear, and feel spirit so clearly when we were young. The channel was clean because life hadn't cluttered it yet. But when life gets heavy — and working those kinds of hours is heavy — your mind shifts into survival mode. You start operating from the part of your brain that is focused on problem solving, reasoning, making sure your needs are met, getting through the day. That is a necessary part of being human. But it is also the part of you that makes it very hard to receive. Receiving requires softness. It requires space. It requires you to slow down enough for spirit to get a word in. Your ancestors and guides have not gone anywhere. They are still there. They are still talking. The signal hasn't changed — your ability to receive it has been interrupted by the noise of life. So the work right now is not about doing more spiritually. It is about creating space to receive. That means finding something that helps you release the heaviness and come back into your body — whether that is a spiritual bath, a walk in nature, music that moves you, sitting in silence for even ten minutes before you start your day. Something that signals to your nervous system that it is safe to be soft right now. Start small. Before you go to your Egungun, take three deep breaths and consciously set down everything that is worrying you — just for that moment. Give yourself permission to not be in problem-solving mode for those few minutes. That small act of releasing can open the channel more than you realize.

I would like to thank my Baba Victor & Madrina AFEFE for welcoming my wife and i into their home and ILE. I would also like to thank all the apetebi’s for their help and knowledge as well . To all the babalow’s in the ile. The love was felt and knowing that we are apart of an ile whos willing to open their doors and guidance and accepting two people they dont know is the greatest assurance of faith and intention that is unmatched in this world. Im glad to know my wife and i found a home that accepted us and will show us how to hone in on our ability’s. And that we arent alone in this life that we walk . We found out our guardian orisha’s and look forward to the journey with our new family. If any of you skool app members get a feeling like i did finding this place than know you are in good hands because the way my wife and i feel now after our ceremonies this past weekend that this is the place and theres no other out there thats meant for you . Ashe’ to you all May u find your home here like i and my wife did. Love and blessings is prominent don’t hesitate when u think is this place for me. The answer is “YES” it is. ALAFIA”. “Temple Orisha Ile Ifa”

Inspired by a question from our community member @Tara Dishmon — thank you for asking this so beautifully. One of the most common questions I receive from people who are new to this tradition is some version of what Tara asked: "I don't know which things are supposed to happen and in what order — if that makes sense?" It makes complete sense. And I want you to know — there is no such thing as a silly question when you're finding your footing on a sacred path. The fact that you're asking means you're taking this seriously, and I respect that deeply. So let's talk about it. First, something important to understand: Every spiritual house — every ile — does things a little differently. The Lucumí tradition is vast and beautiful, and the order of initiations can vary based on the house, the lineage, and most importantly, what Ifá reveals for you specifically. What I'm sharing here is how we do things in our ile, at Temple Orisha Ile Ifa. Your path may look slightly different depending on your spiritual needs and what divination uncovers. And that's not a problem — that's the tradition working exactly as it should. With that said, here is our general template. Step 1: A General Reading — This Always Comes First. Before anything else happens, the first step is sitting with Baba Victor for an Ifá reading. This is non-negotiable, and here's why — Ifá is the map. Without the map, you're just guessing. A reading reveals where you are spiritually, what you need, and what your next step looks like. It takes all of the guesswork out of the journey and replaces it with clarity and direction. Nothing moves before this step. Step 2: Guardian Orisha Reveal. Once you've had your reading, the next step is finding out which Orisha owns your head. Every person has a Guardian Orisha — a specific sacred energy that governs their life, their personality, and their destiny. Knowing who your Guardian Orisha is changes everything. It's like finally understanding why you are the way you are. Things start to make sense in a whole new way.

I recently posed a question to Madrina privately and she also asked me To share it here. I asked her if I was allowed to do womb work on my cycle & what her opinion was of it

Bendiciones @Kayla Garcia D. Bourque ! I love everything about what you just shared — you are asking exactly the right questions and working on exactly the right things. Learning to discern what is you versus what is spirit is honestly some of the most important work a developing medium can do. Most people skip this step and it causes so much confusion down the road. The fact that you're prioritizing it tells me your development is going in a really healthy direction. Here are some resources across each area you mentioned: Psychic & Mediumship Development - Sanaya Roman — Opening to Channel is a classic for learning to distinguish your own thoughts from spirit communication - James Van Praagh — Talking to Heaven and Reaching to Heaven are warm, accessible entry points into mediumship development - Gordon Smith — The Unbelievable Truth offers a grounded, honest look at how mediumship actually works - Sonia Choquette — The Psychic Pathway is excellent for developing intuitive discernment specifically Quieting the Mind / Spiritual Discipline ( I met her in person, she's so sweet) - Eckhart Tolle — The Power of Now remains one of the best books ever written on silencing mental noise - Thich Nhat Hanh — The Miracle of Mindfulness is simple, practical, and genuinely transformative - don Miguel Ruiz — The Four Agreements speaks directly to the internal chatter that gets in the way of clear spiritual perception Ifá & Lukumí Tradition - Wande Abimbola — Ifá: An Exposition of Ifá Literary Corpus — if you read one book on Ifá, this is it - Lydia Cabrera — El Monte — foundational for understanding the tradition's relationship with nature and spiritual forces - John Mason — anything he has written is worth your time - David H. Brown — Santería Enthroned for deep ethnographic context - Joseph Murphy — Santería: African Spirits in America is a great starting point if you're newer to academic study of the tradition Yoruba Language Resources