I have a reader magnet on sign up of my author newsletter. It's a POV swap of one of the chapters in my debut spicy historical romance novella "Serpent & Spice" (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FPDYSR4F) that captures the "first time" but this is from the MMC POV and not the FMC POV as is in the book. https://subscribepage.io/SSlaunch

@Phlip T I'm just starting out (debut) so sign ups have been quite slow. I just got all my materials up last night so now that I have an Amazon page to link to and presales as an option and ticking closer to release, I'm hoping conversion from Tiktok follower to newsletter sub will increase. I'll be making that final push of posts and things these coming 3 weeks.

I read through the first 2 pages fully, and then skimmed a few more to see if things changed. You have a great style of writing the first person stream of thought. It's quite engaging... But... It is very untethered from the reality of what is actually taking place outside this person. There is no setting description, to understanding of who this person is whose head we're in, and the world they find themselves in. From what I gathered from context clues is: this is being written down (or at least partially) by the main character, they seem potentially female, and perhaps a vampire (talk about sunlit honey smell, and later about the blood and heart in a rib cage, and name like Vlad thrown out). But it'd be great to have the main character describe where they are in the different scenes, or is it like journal entries? If journal entries, then id' suggest adding an entry marker at the top of each one. And I'd almost suggest having a specific visual treatment (indented) for the main character's written journal prose, and then add their in the moment thoughts that are not written down to help set the environment for the reader... help us visualize the scene, bring us along for the journey (like throw in a sentence or two about their world as they discuss, like when you talk about Vlad, who he is, why he matters to us, tell us about the meaning of Coronation, and it's ties to throwing balls, er... parties). We are stuck in this person's head, yet can't see much through their eyes (though your description of sunlit honey was superb, give us more of that!) I hope that helps some.

I've got a cozy mystery that I just finished a first draft on, and now reading it through for first pass review.

"I have obligations to attend and disappointment to bestow on those who call me family." Love that sentence!!

I'm trying to capture who's POV we're in right now? It's not Daisy, the chapter is labeled Harper. We are "in the head" of perhaps a male that is pining for Daisy? It took me until that later part (top of page 2) to get there, but are we Harper "Wild child" Wild?

I think they look great! Loving the theme of them, the consistency, but not a copy and paste. They each have their own slight vibe! Great work!