@Thor Aarsand you mentioned using trending music for our transformation post.... All I want for Christmas by Mariah Carey is on the rise right now....

Is anyone having issues with trending music??? I've ever had an issue before and today of all days I have no trending songs on my list and even when I went to try save a song it doesn't allow me to save, when I search specific songs they won't appear at all. As if there's a dark cloud over Bulgaria right now or something. Does anyone have any tricks for this situation please... I don't want to post with a random melody.🙏

Ummm, idk how I’m going to shorten this because, phew, each section was like 5 paragraphs before this 🤣🙈 Before — The Sensitive Seer: I came into this world sensitive AF — to light, energy, emotions, everything. My mom said I’d just stop breathing out of nowhere, break out in seizures + my body would turn purple. Doctors called it Paroxysmal Torticollis of Infancy — I was experiencing migraines, and my tiny body didn’t know how to handle the pain. I call it surviving in a world that always felt too loud for me. I could read people before they spoke. Feel their emotions before they displayed them. But instead of being seen as intuitive, I was labeled with anger issues, dramatic, depressed, too emotional, too much. Even with all of that, I’ve always loved people. I’ve always had this huge heart that just wants to understand others — what shaped them, what they’ve been through, why they are the way they are. People have always fascinated me. I’ve always wanted to help, to heal, to be the one that could make others feel seen. When my parents divorced, it crushed me. My sense of safety disappeared overnight. I attended three different schools growing up — every time I started to get close to people, I had to leave. I never really felt rooted anywhere. I just wanted to belong, to be understood, to be loved for who I actually was. But I didn’t feel safe being me. So I learned how to perform — the cool girl, the funny one, the one who pretended she didn’t feel everything so damn deeply. By high school, I was searching for worth in all the wrong places — alcohol + drugs, boys, and chaos that made the emptiness a little quieter. Crisis — The Spiral: At first, I thought my partying was just a phase — something I’d grow out of once life “got serious.” But in the Midwest, drinking is the culture. It’s how people connect, how weekends start, how pain gets swallowed. I didn’t realize yet that what felt normal was actually my slow unraveling. When I got my DUI in 2014, I was 20 years old and numb. Part of my sentencing was to spend 27 hours in jail — cold floor, bright lights, no sense of time. I was so scared straight and numb that I didn’t cry for a solid 6 months after. I shut every feeling off inside of me. I told myself it wasn’t that deep, that everyone makes mistakes… but deep down I knew. Something inside me had gone silent. I eventually went back to drinking, pretending I had it handled. There were nights I’d lie awake wishing I just wouldn’t wake up. Not because I wanted to die, but because I didn’t know how to live inside the weight of my own mind. I was tired of fighting myself. Numbness felt safer than feeling everything.

Well fam... It's my first time ever sharing my story somewhere public... Thank yoy for reading, thank you for letting us be, thank you for this safe space to surrender and share our stories. With a lot of love and ligth in my heart, I share my story with you my beautiful soul sisters and brothers!!💖 Before I was born into an environment that taught me how I had to be. I was molded into something that wasn’t truly me. Growing up in a strict religious sect, I was surrounded by rules, guilt, and fear — learning to feel unworthy of the love of my family and god if I didn’t obey. At a very young age, my innocence was taken, shaping the way I saw my body and myself — as an object, not as sacred. From childhood, I lived in parallel worlds, wearing masks, lying to myself and to everyone around me, unsure of who I really was. I was bullied and rejected, both at school and within the religion. It broke something inside me. Depression took root early, disconnecting me from my essence. The judgment I carried for being “someone fake” was eating me alive. Crisis When I turned 18, my mother asked me one day: “Elina, why don’t you talk to us? Why do you isolate yourself like we don’t exist?” I broke down completely. I told her everything: the pain, the abuse, the bullying, the years of silence. I cried for everything I had never said. I felt lost, broken, and without any will to live. Chase A few months later, I couldn’t bear the lies anymore. I decided to leave Finland and move to Spain. Distance gave me courage, and I told my family everything. I revealed my true beliefs, my decisions, and my desire for freedom. I left the strict religious sect, the cost was high: I lost my family, friends, and community. I fell into a deep emptiness, but I stayed strong, because freedom and sovereignty meant more to me than approval or my family. I realized I was alone, completely. No one to lean on, no safety net. Just me and my pain. From now on, I didn't have the opcion to fail, it was time to survive.

Step 1: Before I was born in Bulgaria but grew up in Cape Town, South Africa. My life back then was wild. I was modeling, partying, alcohol, and surrounded by people who seemed confident but were just as lost as I was. Most days, I was out drinking, chasing attention — mostly from men — because deep down, I didn’t know who I was without it. My dad wasn’t around, and my mom was doing her best jugling work and raising two kids alone, so I learned to figure things out by myself. I was lonely, even when I was surrounded by people. I kept telling myself this was normal, but deep down, I knew it wasn’t. I just didn’t know any different. Step 2: Crisis The breaking point came when the darkness I’d been dancing with finally showed its teeth. The drinking, the parties, the people — it all led me to being sexually abused, and everything inside me shattered after that. The years that followed were some of the hardest of my life. I fell into depression, carrying shame, confusion, and anger I didn’t know how to express. I withdrew into myself, pretending to be okay while falling apart inside. I felt stripped not only of safety but of self. My heart was heavy, and my spirit felt disconnected — as if the light inside me had dimmed. That experience stayed with me for years, shaping how I saw the world and myself. Step 3: Chase After the darkness came a flicker of light. My first act of healing was walking into my first yoga class ever and I had no idea it would change everything. By the end, lying in Shavasana, I couldn’t stop crying. For the first time, I felt a connection to something greater than myself — something pure and unexplainable. That class cracked me open. I started attending more sessions, then discovered meditation, breathwork, and stillness. I found solace in the words of Eckhart Tolle and Wayne Dyer’s talks and guided meditations. Their teachings became my lifeline, showing me that peace wasn’t somewhere outside — it was within me. But it wasn’t easy. Back then, spirituality wasn’t common, and for years, I hid parts of myself to fit into a world that didn’t yet have space for souls like mine.