Time is one of our most valuable assets. You can't beg, borrow or buy more, so use what you have wisely. Below is an Eisenhower Matrix where tasks are broken out into a 4 quadrant matrix of Urgency and Importance. Manage emergencies (Q1), limit distractions (Q3), avoid the Zombies (Q4) and spend as much time as possible planning and building relationships (Q2). If you intentionally spend time in Q2, you will likely feel better, be more productive and find you have built deeper and stronger connections.

Welcome Yaya Bojang to Owen Army! One of the guys I've been mentoring from the Gambia Africa recently joined Owen Army. He is a huge fan of We Fight Monsters and the mission Ben & Jess set out to accomplish. Yaya wants to make a difference in his country for his people and his family. This is a good place to learn.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about war stories—mine and everyone else’s. I don’t hate them. I never have. They matter. They come from real places, real cost, real consequence. When shared with purpose, they teach restraint, humility, and respect for what violence actually takes from a human being. But I’ve also seen how easily they can turn into a loop. There was a time when I didn’t know who I was without my stories. They became proof. Credibility. Armor. I told myself I was honoring the past, but if I’m honest, I was often reliving it. Re-activating it. Feeding something inside me that didn’t want to be quiet. That’s not strength. That’s a lack of self-awareness. I’ve sat through countless trainings as a cop where most of the day was war stories. Some from overseas. Some from the street. Some from decades ago. Stories can be powerful—but when they’re self-serving, when they reinforce identity instead of building capacity, they miss the point. Experience without reflection is just memory. Self-awareness changes the question. Not what happened to me? But how am I relating to it now? I’ve learned that sometimes we don’t return to these stories because they still need to be told—we return to them because our nervous system recognizes the feeling. The certainty. The activation. The version of ourselves that once knew exactly who it was. But growth asks something different. It asks us to carry the past without becoming it. To remember without reliving. To teach without performing. The strongest people I know aren’t the loudest storytellers. They’re the ones who can sit quietly with their past without needing to explain it. They know who they are now. They’re not negotiating with who they were. I don’t want fewer stories. I want more conscious ones. Stories that serve purpose, not ego. Stories that point forward, not backward. Stories that end in responsibility, not applause. The past is a teacher. It was never meant to be a cage.

Most people think lying is simple. It’s not. Lying is work—and understanding why people lie and how the brain behaves under deception can help civilians navigate everyday life more safely and intelligently. This isn’t about interrogations. It’s about situational awareness, boundaries, and discernment. Why People Lie (At a Human Level) People don’t usually lie because they’re “bad people.” They lie because their brain is trying to avoid consequences. That consequence could be: - Social embarrassment - Reputational damage - Financial loss - Relationship fallout - Accountability When someone feels threatened—emotionally or socially—the nervous system activates, and deception becomes a coping strategy The Hidden Cost of Lying: Cognitive Load Telling the truth is simple. You just recall what happened. Lying is mentally expensive. A person who lies has to: - Suppress the real story - Invent a believable alternative - Keep it consistent over time - Anticipate questions - Monitor how they’re coming across That mental strain often shows up indirectly—not as obvious “tells,” but as subtle changes in behavior What Civilians Often Notice (Without Realizing Why) When someone is under cognitive strain from deception, you may observe: - Delayed or overly careful answers - Vague language instead of specifics - Over-control of emotions (too calm, too rehearsed) - Deflecting instead of directly answering - Inconsistencies over time Important note: These don’t prove someone is lying. But patterns matter more than moments. Emotional “Leakage” Is Real Even when someone tries to control themselves, emotions can leak through: - Anxiety about being exposed - Guilt or shame - Occasionally, subtle satisfaction at “getting away with it” These leaks are often brief and unconscious—which is why listening and observing calmly is more powerful than confrontation Why This Matters for Everyday Life For civilians, this knowledge helps you:

This is what a normal day looks like for me. No highlight reel. No filters. No politics. Just real life in South Memphis—through my eyes. In this episode of Life Through Ben’s Eyes, you’re riding shotgun with me and Cody as we load up at the house and head straight into the hood. You’ll see one of our former dope houses that we shut down and converted into a Hope House—now being prepared for trafficking survivors and kids who deserve a real shot at life. We stop next door to check in on Crecia and her family—equal parts wisdom, chaos, and comedy. If you’ve never heard hard-earned street truth delivered with perfect comedic timing, you’re in for a treat. Then we head downtown to 777 South Main Street, the newest building we’re fighting to turn into a full-scale detox and rehab center—because recovery shouldn’t be reserved for people with money, connections, or clean pasts. This isn’t a documentary. It’s not scripted. It’s not safe. It’s just life—seen from the ground level, where the problems actually live. If you’ve ever wondered what it really takes to change a city, protect kids, and turn hell into something that looks a lot more like hope—this is for you. 👇 If this matters to you: - Like the video - Subscribe to the channel - Share it with someone who needs to see real work being done - Drop a comment—I read them Even monster fighters get tired sometimes. But we don’t quit.