I started letting things slide . Because I thought oh it’s fine I can just carry on the way I am and I’ll manage to stay clean. Big mistake , I realise now recovery takes continuous work , and just because I got a mere 3 and a half weeks in , doesn’t mean I’ve cracked it: I new my thinking was getting bad because I started to negotiate . But temptation and romanticising the high got the better of me when actually there was more I could do to prevent a relapse , I just got complacent .

Feeling accomplished for sure ! It’s been tough but so worth it !!

I am adding days 30 through 90 tonight.

One thing I want to clarify for people early in recovery: There’s a phase where progress is happening, but it doesn’t feel rewarding yet. That phase trips a lot of people up. When substances are removed, the brain doesn’t immediately replace artificial stimulation with motivation or excitement. It goes through a recalibration period first. During that time: - routines can feel neutral instead of rewarding - wins don’t create a dopamine spike - consistency matters more than motivation - validation doesn’t land the way it used to This is not a sign that recovery isn’t working. It’s a sign that your nervous system is resetting its baseline. What’s important here is not chasing stimulation to “feel better,” but continuing to: - maintain hygiene - keep simple routines - move your body - show up consistently The reward returns later — cleaner, steadier, and more sustainable. People who understand this phase don’t panic or relapse when motivation feels flat. They stay consistent long enough for the system to come fully back online. If you’re in this stage, you’re not behind. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.

I have been clean about 2 or 3 weeks now but my boyfriend went to a detox last night and it took a lot to get him to go and I feel pressure of trying to take care of everyone else that some days it crosses my mind to relapse and not care