I recently had my Ex end the relationship with me and its been A month. Its only yesterday that I promised not to chase her again. Yesterday as well, I Threw away clothes including stuff she gifted me but there certain gifts that I feel bad for throwing away like those postcards. Issue is, everytime I open up my drawer looking for something, I see those cards and it brings me back to that state of mind of guilt and sorrow. The question is, should I throw them away? The answer is yes, consciously. But im looking for an excuse or a good reason to keep them since im still attached to them. Yet, because of that attachment, is the reason why I wanna throw them away to help myself move on and not get pulled into this again. Thanks for reading.

I’m at this point right now where I keep forgetting and then remembering again. Forgetting and remembering. Over and over. I’m not my thoughts anymore. I’m just playing this game called life

I haven’t posted in a while but I’ve been sitting with something for a long time and I’d like to hear your thoughts. For a very long time now I‘ve been experiencing extremely strong hyper self awareness. I’m almost constantly observing myself from the outside. Even with the most basic things walking, eating, brushing my teeth, or just sitting there’s always a part of me that’s watching myself do it like I’m both the actor and the spectator at the same time. There’s almost always this observer standing slightly outside watching everything. I used to think this was spiritual growth or detachment especially because it makes me very calm. But lately I’ve been questioning if this is actually healthy or if it’s a form of dissociation. Does anyone here experience something similar? Is this normal on the spiritual path or have I gone too far into my head? Would really appreciate your honest opinions

Last night my brother called me instead of spiraling into another PTSD fueled psychic break. We talked about feelings being real and important but not inherently dangerous. The thing that makes them dangerous is when we give them power to make decisions for us. This is the first time he's reached out to me instead of going to substances or actually needing to be hospitalized because of attems to harm himself. Today it was sunny and not so bad for him. I'm thankful for the language I've integrated from Rey's videos that's helped me be there for him, myself, and others.

I‘ve been trying for a short time to get into the habit of speaking about myself in the third person in my head for everyday things like: He gotta take a shit. He is angry. He is hungry. He thinks this and that, etc. This seems like a clever trick to create distance. It helps me separate myself from my self-image, my emotions, thoughts, and my body/flesh. Instead of identifying with everything, I see it as an observer: so the ego is no longer my enemy or my master, but a partner in a symbiotic relationship. I remain the one who directs it without letting it devour me. It’s like a game or theater or satire. I build up the ego, push it with affirmations, etc., but I always know that “he” is just the mask I wear to achieve my goals. The idea came to me from the anime “Record of Ragnarok” when Apollo fought Leonidas in the second season. Life is truly limitless, and you can be whoever you want. A huge theater piece. At the end of the day, I can take off the mask and always be who I am, in silence. It’s best to speak of oneself in the third person only in one’s thoughts and not in conversations with other people because otherwise they think you’re a psychopath 😹 But what do yall think about this?