It’s been a hard week. Lots of food noise. Loud. Constant. Everytime I go to eat, my mind tells me why I shouldn’t. “Too many carbs. Check the label. Unhealthy. You will gain. You’re not even hungry. Drink your coffee. Grab a Diet Coke”. All I do is think about what I’m going to eat. And how to avoid eating.
I’m currently sitting in my school break room for lunch, staring at my 160 calorie muscle milk and 100 calorie chomp. We are going out for Italian tonight and all I hear is noise. “Better check the menu. You can’t eat pasta. Don’t eat lunch so you can eat tonight. “
I don’t know what I need. Vent? Advice? Lunch? All I know is that everyday is louder than the last. And I know what I need to do but the noise is just too loud. Too constant. Too convincing.