Holidays · Parenting Adult Children Today

Holidays

I know holidays surface mixed feelings among parents. For some, it is the memories that propel us to keep pushing forward with the hope of repeating the joy of the past. For others, it is the fear of dealing with the unexpected or walking on eggshells with children with whom we struggle to understand. Regardless of what is going on with our children, we have to be sure we keep a healthy perspective.

Here are two things to consider:

Stay present in the day you are in. Do not write out the next few years based upon the events of the day or weekend. Too often we react to the pain of the moment and then spiral down a path that is based up pure conjecture. This behavior is not helpful nor does it give your growth a chance to unfold in the days, weeks, months, and years ahead.
Give yourself permission to grieve if you are sad, overwhelmed, or angry. Remember that anger is a mask for fear and fear is at the core of every loss. Don't deny or minimize your emotions but allow them to be released so you don't get stuck and become bitter or resentful. Healing that is delayed hurts the future relationship you desire to have with your children.

As you work through the P.A.R.E.N.T. Method, you will build confidence, gain insight, and find hope because you are gaining relationship wisdom for you and your family. This weekend is a holiday but it is not the end of your story. Give yourself the time and space become an even healthier version of yourself so you can be connected to them with few, if any, regrets.

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