TRANSPARENCY… IT'S SOMETIMES TERRIFYING AF…

🔥

and I mean ACTUAL transparency… not the sanitised version people post about… the real kind… the kind that makes ur stomach flip a little before u hit send…

𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲'𝘀 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗜 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀…

𝗶𝗳 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗼𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗜 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝘂 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗼𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱… I'll say this is an automated message but the real me will be back… because u deserve to know when ur talking to a bot and when ur talking to me… I think pretending it's personal when it isn't kills something way more important…

𝗶𝗳 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲 𝗜'𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲… again I won't dress it up as personal when it ain't… even when part of me goes ooh maybe just don't mention it… nah… say it…

if I took an idea or inspiration from someone else I'll say where it came from… always… because taking credit for someone else's thinking makes me wanna vom a little… and I've seen people do it… and I've seen the person whose idea it was see it… and it's fcken grim…

𝗶𝗳 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗜'𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴… like I said out loud that THE BACKROOM has been quieter… and yeah that little voice in me head was going don't say that… people will think ur failing… people will leave… and I said it anyway… because pretending everything's perfect when it isn't is just another form of performance and I'm done with that… and look yup I totes know we do not need to declare every downhill slide…

𝗶𝗳 𝗜'𝗺 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗜'𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗜'𝗺 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲… not dress it up as being in my era of something or a season of rest or whatever the version is… sometimes things are just hard and that's the truth of it… HUMANING hey…

𝗶𝗳 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽 𝗜 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗴𝗼 𝘂𝗽… not after… simples…

if I change my mind about something I'll say I changed my mind… even if I was really loud about it b4… even if it's embarrassing… yeah… I changed my mind… humans do that…

and here's the BIG bit

being this transparent is sometimes terrifyin… there are posts I've written where me heart's going don't send that… what if people judge u… what if they leave… what if they think ur not successful enough or together enough or whatever enough…

and I send it anyway…gulp

coz I know what it feels like to follow someone who turns out to be a different person behind closed doors… and I never ever wanna be that for someone else…

trust is not built on perfection… trust is built on truth… and the moment u start managing how people see u instead of just showing them who u actually are… u've lost the thing that makes people actually want to be around u…

I've seen people build huge audiences on a version of themselves that isn't real… and then spend all their energy maintaining that version… and it's exhausting AF… and it's fragile… one crack and the whole thing falls apart…

whereas when u build on truth… the trust compounds… people know they're getting the real version every single time… and THAT is what makes someone buy… stay… refer… come back… not because ur perfect… because ur real…

𝘁̲𝗿̲𝗮̲𝗻̲𝘀̲𝗽̲𝗮̲𝗿̲𝗲̲𝗻̲𝗰̲𝘆̲ ̲𝗶̲𝘀̲𝗻̲'̲𝘁̲ ̲𝗮̲ ̲𝘀̲𝘁̲𝗿̲𝗮̲𝘁̲𝗲̲𝗴̲𝘆̲ ̲𝗳̲𝗼̲𝗿̲ ̲𝗺̲𝗲̲…̲

it's just the only way I know how to do this… and honestly… I wouldn't have it any other way…

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹…

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TRANSPARENCY… IT'S SOMETIMES TERRIFYING AF…