Part of the assignment was to slow down and get clear on what I’d want each member of my family to say about me. That part felt grounding. Hopeful. Connecting. I felt grateful. And then came the curveball I didn’t see coming. “What are the things you are doing that the typical husband or dad is not doing?” I just sat there. Wide-eyed. My first thought was:…shit. I don’t know. Because if I’m honest, my brain immediately went to everything I struggle with: I’m inattentive. I’m often self focused. My nervous system gets overwhelmed easily. Im snappy I have time blindness I started life a decade behind my biological peers. I leave cabinet doors open. I forget birthdays and appointments I hyperfocus on things that don’t always serve me—knives, backpacks, keyboards. I’m impulsive. And when I stripped all that away and asked the harder question Am I actually doing anything different than a typical husband or dad? The answer felt uncomfortably close to no. Yes, I show up. Yes, I engage. Yes, I work on myself almost every day trying to understand who I am, how ADHD shows up in my life, and how it impacts the people I love. I attempt to take the things others tell me and show up more aware. Conscientious. There’s a quote that says having ADHD is working twice as hard to get half as far, while being told you’re not trying hard enough. But for most of my life, I’ve been fighting and clawing just to reach baseline. And baseline is exhausting. That’s part of the trap for those of us with ADHD: We start believing the baseline is the goal. I once said I was doing better than my parents at awareness, connection, participation. Someone replied, “And that’s the goal?” That one hit hard. Because the answer is no. Because there is still room to grow Especially when others closet to you need you to. This isn't about shame Or guilt Or not being good enough. This is about what is takes to be the husband and father I want to be. Desire to be. This is about who I want to be now

Ever feel like the world is working against your brain? There’s a reason. Our systems school, work, even family expectations were built for one kind of mind: linear, consistent, predictable. But ADHD brains? We’re not built on straight lines. We run on variable attention, creativity, rapid pattern recognition, intuition, and high-focus only when something actually matters. And here’s the real problem: We’re taught to succeed using systems designed for brains that don’t work like ours. It’s like telling someone who needs glasses to squint. A dyslexic to just slow down. A diabetic to produce more insulin. A man in a wheelchair to take the stairs. The issue is the effort. It is the faulty architecture. Our classrooms reward sameness. Our workplaces reward monotony. Our culture rewards consistency over creativity. And at home? Marriage rewards safety over unpredictability. Even with the best intentions, inconsistency feels unsafe to the people who depend on your follow-through. Not because they don’t love you. But because nervous systems respond to patterns, not promises. This is the clash not between you and your family but between your ADHD wiring and the expectations you were never trained to meet. But here’s the truth: ADHD brains thrive on…• novelty meaningful challenge movement connection dopamine-supported structure rest that actually recharges systems that work with our wiring Today’s video isn’t a complaint. Not about being a victim to the system. But a declaration. A declaration to understand. You don’t need to fix your brain. You need systems that finally fit your brain. If you’ve ever wondered: “Why do I struggle in the exact systems everyone else seems to thrive in?”…this is why. And it’s time to rewrite the blueprint. Let’s get into it.

This is where the work starts to work. You’ve made it this far 17 days in. And right about now… it’s normal to feel it. The dip. The boredom. The “I’ll catch up tomorrow.” The quiet voice whispering, “Does this even matter?” It does. This is where new habits start to form —right past the point where old ones used to quit. Your brain is fighting for the familiar. But your heart? It’s learning a new rhythm. You have built awareness Have practiced discipline Now it’s time to take heart. Because real growth doesn’t always feel like winning. Sometimes it feels like dragging yourself forward one small promise at a time. This is the middle — the forge. Where old patterns burn off and new ones begin to form. Reflection:“Where do I usually quit — and what’s one small thing I can keep doing today?” Why It Matters: The ADHD brain craves novelty but transformation comes through consistency. This is where you prove to yourself that the new version of you isn’t built on motivation, shame, guilt, fear, anger... It is built with heart. You are not behind. You are building. Take heart, stay steady, and keep showing up. The man you’re becoming is built right here in the middle.