What comes up for me is …
-Disregard the idea that “I allowed it” as it isn’t accurate . The truth is . When someone wants to hurt us they will find a way and it has nothing to do will welcoming it. This is not A trauma informed approach and it’s outdated .
-not my fault , out of my control , not deserving , not complicit .
-my lane of the street is clean, and my intentions have been pure and without toxic ego
-I take responsibility for not standing up for myself better and for not showing up for myself better , but I will no longer take accountability for my abusers actions in any type of way . At all. Ever.
- I accept that I tried to Survive the best I could with the tools and information that I had , and I did try to adjust accordingly and create boundaries .
-I am no longer accepting the perspective of “I allowed it “
I am deserving of love and compassion regardless of who else thinks so .