Something terrible happened today and I’m trying to not spiral 🌀 · 𝙂𝙊𝙊𝙎𝙄𝙁𝙔 🍓🐛🦋🌈⭐️🩷

Barbara Guimaraes

2d • 🍓 Chat

Something terrible happened today and I’m trying to not spiral 🌀

I was terminated from a job today over an I-9 documentation issue.

There were things I should have handled sooner.

There were steps I didn’t follow through on correctly.

That part is on me.

What’s sitting with me is how familiar this pattern is.

Not because I don’t care. I care deeply.

But because attention and executive functioning challenges keep showing up in structured work environments in ways that cost me, even when I’m trying and even when the work matters to me.

I’m not sharing this to excuse it.

I’m sharing it because pretending it’s just a one-off mistake hasn’t helped me learn from it.

Fast-paced systems, admin-heavy tasks, tight compliance rules, and little margin for error are hard for me to sustain long term, especially when I’m managing medication changes and mood instability.

That’s uncomfortable to say out loud.

There’s a lot of shame in realizing that wanting to work full time, or wanting to “be more together,” doesn’t automatically make it accessible. There’s grief in accepting that capacity has limits that motivation alone can’t fix.

Today feels like a forced pause. Not a clean one. A clarifying one.

I’m trying to hold responsibility without turning it into self-punishment. I can see where I dropped the ball, and I can also see that continuing to ignore how my brain actually works has not served me.

Right now I’m focused on next steps. Exploring part-time options. Looking into disability. Rebuilding income in ways that are more sustainable.

I’m sharing this here because a lot of us run communities, build systems, and support others while quietly struggling behind the scenes. We talk about alignment, sustainability, and values, but it’s harder to admit when our own structures are breaking us.

This is me learning in real time.

If you’re a community builder or operator who’s been forced to rethink how you work because of burnout, disability, or capacity limits, you’re not alone.

If it feels okay to share, what’s something your work has recently asked you to look at more honestly?

16 comments