You're just a human · Daniel Rubin LMHC LPC

You're just a human

Got asked on a podcast why so many men are quietly fighting mental health struggles. My answer wasn't what the question expected.

We've always had issues. That's not new, and I don't buy the framing that this is a modern male crisis. Men have been carrying this forever.

What's actually broken is that therapy got mislabeled. It became an emergency service instead of a tool. And the second something is framed as an emergency service, men start calculating whether they qualify yet.

That's the whole trap. Not resistance. Not denial. Qualification.

Guys in this room do this constantly — I'd bet most of you have run the math at some point and concluded you're not bad enough to take the spot. Somebody has it worse. It's not that serious. I'll go if it gets worse.

So you wait. And then a crisis makes the decision for you, and your first session is damage control instead of actual work.

Here's what I tell men in my office: you're just a human. The idea that you're not supposed to have stuff is a fallacy. There is no version of a person without stuff. There are only people who've looked at theirs and people who haven't yet.

Any tool that improves your life — why wouldn't you use it? Nobody lifts because they're dying. They lift because they'd rather be stronger.

This week's prompt: Have you ever decided you weren't "bad enough" to ask for help — therapy, a meeting, a hard conversation, anything?

What was the bar you were waiting to clear? And who set it?

— Daniel | 404-668-8369

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You're just a human