My biggest challenge lately has been making sure I prioritize my time and get the “to dos” done. As busy as it gets this time of year, it’s so easy for me to push off Bible time or devotional time, or Men’s Edge time off “only one day”. Forget that, I came into this program to get my crap together and improve, I need to make this a priority. After this was pointed out to me after some reflection, I’m getting up earlier everyday to make sure I get the “to dos” done before the busyness of the day has a chance to get the better of me.

I was inspired by Harrison to reflect on some wins I’ve had lately, the biggest one, to me lately, is that I took some time for myself this past weekend, and went to visit my best friend from college. I know that doesn’t seem like much, but I’ve even married for over 15 years now, and honestly a part of me has gotten lost. I love my wife, I love my kids, but in 15 years I haven’t taken one day to recharge my own batteries. Taking a day, going to catch up with a great friend in person instead of over text or social media, was awesome! I’m sure I’m not the only one that has fallen into this. It’s so easy with busy families to just keep going, keep going to the next thing. Yes, it’s extremely important to be a loving, grounded husband and father, but it’s also important to be a great friend as well and pour into ourselves as well. Iron sharpens iron, and this friend definitely keeps me focused on being the best version of myself, and vice versa. The holiday season gets busy, it’s easy to get lost in the business of it. Make sure not to forget about yourself!

I feel like I've really gotten better at this over the past few weeks. My wife's rejection doesn't affect me nearly as much as it used to. The chaos our kids can cause at times does not rattle me like it used to. I did try hard mode and asked my wife where she has seen or felt you crack, react or disassociate. She told me she can't remember anywhere where I hadn't maintained my composure for quite some time, other than the kids told her that I got upset when she went shopping for a half a day with friends, and our kids wanted to constantly text her throughout the day (we have an extra cell phone we use as "house phone" in case we have to make quick errands and leave kids at home for 10-20 minutes). Anyway anytime my wife leaves, my daughter who is extremely clingy with my wife tries to hoard the phone and constantly texts my wife. I simply told her this time that she could have access to the phone, but I didn't think it was necessary to constantly text my wife. After my wife told me this, I told her we should think about the whole texting thing, figure out some guidelines and talk as a family so we're all on the same page going forward.

Well cold showers are definitely something. How long do you strive to stay in the shower to “master this”? Also my wife and I hardly ever fight, I fact I can’t even really remember the last time we fought, so I switched the conflict module to with my kids. Of course it didn’t take very long for them to get in an argument. Nevertheless, “Stop, let’s take a break to calm down and take a few minutes to breathe” sounds a lot better when I said it sternly, but slow and calm, vs how I always used to say it which was basically yelling over my kids so they would listen to me. Calm, cool, controlled composure does go along way.

Guys this is what community and having a circle of high calibre men is for. This share from @Scott Mathiowetz on @Daniel Edge post was outstanding. Sharing his experience, his actions and outcomes. No force, no judgement just solid passing of wisdom. And since then I’ve seen many of you @Alec Liebhardt @David Quinones offer your insights as well in similar depth and courage. Well done gents ✊🏾 #wearegroundedmen