Week 16 Tasking Emotional decharge overview: 1. Choose a strong negative emotion to decharge 2. Recall the earliest memory of an event where you felt this emotion 3. Imagine zooming out from the event and observing it from above 4. From this new perspective, can you see any positive takeaways of the event you couldn't see before? 5. Float back before this memory and see if the emotion is present, or changed. If it is, repeat the previous step again 6. Return to the original memory and notice what has changed. What can be learned and taken forward? 7. Now move forward to the future and imagine being in a situation that would normally trigger this emotion, bringing this new learning along. How does it feel different this time? 8. Come back to the present and observe how the emotion feels now

Week 17 Tasking: James' stories: - Because I came from a dysfunctional family, I ended up partially creating one - I can't get away from - It must be something in my cells - the universe was sending clients with my issues - I couldn't deal with it (coaching) - I felt like a hypocrite - It's pissing me off - I'm buying presents for grandchildren I haven't seen - Videos sent of the kids unwrapping the presents, but videos being cut off before there's any dialogue - "Whether that's a coincidence, who knows" - My son, who is doing work on himself, THANK GOD - I seem to be attracted to people who are really really spiteful - I don't think I'm spiteful - I do react, which isn't good - I find it very difficult dealing with my kids - My ex wife, that's another story - we won't go there - Instead of dealing with things in an open heartfelt manner, I find myself reacting because, as you can appreciate, it's all my fault. Whatever's going on, whatever's gone on, it's all my fault - It's a very hard thing to take on board when there's no give or take - It's ball-breaking - I'm not a good Samaritan. When someone hits me I hit them back - I've got a heart, I know I have - I don't hold grudges unless I really really feel I'm on an uphill and can't seem to get level - I want to help people but I need to get rid of this negative feeling that I'm a hypocrite - I am working at it - I feel like I'm in a war - I find it very difficult to say it's my fault - I stuck a finger in my own eye and blinded myself, did I? How is it my fault? - Punched son in jaw and broke it - didn't know - Got in altercation with son, got him in a headlock. Daughter tried to pull him off and whether it was intentional or not, gouged his eye - I've allowed myself to not be big enough to forgive my kids Ed's stories: Woman in a 30 year abusive relationship, 18 years divorced. Didn't want to do the truth is statement because "it's his fault". Waiting for him to apologise. He was sick and dying in hospital. She took ownership, delivered truth is statement. It completely changed his behaviour towards her