Much love to you brother.. Know many of us suffer in this reality as it is aware of us especially if we have big purpose..do not think your light goes unnoticed you have far more working to stop the processses than most of the light workers/frequency holders are aware of.. This realm has many unseen and subtle ways it manipulates those it knows are here to end it's riegn.. Nothing can stop gods purpose but they try and we are inconvenienced in the attempts.. We are all protected so nothing to fear but you can enhance your protection they want you down and in low mood so refuse to give in to such whatever the circumstances find that state of peace listen to music that inspires dance do whatever it takes to raise yourself from that which this realm tries to impose.. Sorry i can't do more but I'm in financial hardship also and many more trying circumstances but I know it for what it is a temporary state distracting me from my peace in presence and from my purpose so I find my way back each time I allow it to pull me out if alignment Good luck with all your trying to achieve I will be startin with you .. Where are you so I can get start time in UK