They struggle because adults refuse to come together. Different parenting styles aren’t just annoying, they’re reckless. One house is structure. The other is vibes. One parent corrects. The other protects. And the kids? They don’t need therapy, they need parenting. Scripture is painfully clear on this: “If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.” Mark 3:25 (NASB) When a blended home runs on competing authorities, children learn one thing fast: How to play mom and dad. Unity doesn’t mean you agree on everything. It means you agree on base thing, like who leads, how correction works, and what obedience looks like. “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Ephesians 6:4 (NASB) Notice what Scripture doesn’t say: It doesn’t say “follow your feelings”🤢 It doesn’t say “let the kids decide” It says discipline and instruction. Discipline without unity breeds chaos. Unity without discipline breeds entitlement. And entitlement is one of the fastest ways to poison a home. “For God is not a God of confusion, but of peace.” 1 Corinthians 14:33 (NASB) If your parenting styles clash, don’t ask “What works for the kids?” Ask “What reflects order, authority, and peace under God?” Blended families don’t need softer rules. They need leadership.

I want to challenge one sentence that I've seen damage remarriages. “You knew what you were signing up for.” When people say that, what we really mean is: “This is how I am.” And underneath that is this belief: If you love me, you should just accept it. But marriage is not an acceptance contract. It is a transformation covenant. Remarriage especially. You don’t get to freeze your flaws in place and call it your personality. You don’t get to defend patterns that hurt unity because they were visible before the wedding. Growth is not optional in remarriage. And if we’re honest, sometimes we use that sentence to avoid the harder work — humility, change, and surrender. If you’ve ever said it, ask yourself: Was I protecting the marriage…or protecting myself? There’s a difference. The faster you can become self-aware, The faster you and your spouse can become one. ♥️

But what they really want is comfort. Scripture is straight about this: milk is for infants. Meat is for the mature.(Hebrews 5) Milk says: Encourage me. Meat says: Correct me. Milk wants feelings. Meat wants character. You cannot lead a marriage, a blended family, or a household on milk. Leadership requires discernment, discipline, restraint, and responsibility, and those only grow when you chew on hard truth. If every challenge feels offensive, every boundary feels hard, and every standard gets in the way, you’re not being persecuted, you’re being underdeveloped. Strong families are led by men who can digest meat. Not because it tastes good. But because it builds strength. The question isn’t just “Are you saved?" It’s also “Are you grown?”

They grow strong because two adults decide, over and over, to stay anchored. Progress in a blended home is usually quiet. It looks like choosing unity. It looks like consistency. It looks like leadership. If you’re doing the right things and wondering why it still feels slow, good. That means you’re building something real, not something fragile. Healthy blended families aren’t built on feelings. They’re built on commitment, clarity, and the daily decision to protect the marriage first. Stay steady. What you’re building matters.

Boundaries create freedom but most couples were never taught how to set them together. Where in your marriage do you need clearer boundaries right now?