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Owned by Melinda

Redeemed Imaginations

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A place for Christians who enjoy scifi & fantasy. Be a fan! Be a person of faith! From Tolkien to Silverberg, it'll be here. Relax and enjoy!

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4 contributions to Writer Therapy
A Little Collaborative Fun
@Timothy Colomba I hope this is alright... I thought it would be fun to engage in one of those "write the next line" threads. I'll go first: The old man's bushy white eyebrows rose above his blue eyes like two clouds floating by on a summer afternoon. He leaned forward until I could see the pores on his bulbous nose and wrinkled cheeks. "Sonny," he said to me in his southern drawl, "they sell everything from pens to popcorn machines, but if you can't handle a little supernatural shock and awe every now and then I'd stay far far away from that store." ...
A Little Collaborative Fun
1 like • 7d
And asked me to reach a specific object down from the top shelf. I blinked. I had been expecting something a bit more.... unusual. This was something I got asked to do routinely. I started to reach up. "Wait, wait," she said urgently. "That's no ordinary bit o' metal. You'll be wanting these." She handed me a pair of gloves. Cotton back, rubber on the palm. I put them, finding them to fit perfectly. I reached and took hold of the object.
2.1 - Zane Dowling - The Unspoken
[Read the PDF in the Classroom Tab->Exposure Therapy->Lesson 2.0] ***Story Premise*** Please provide your feedback on the story's premise based on the Prologue.
2 likes • 8d
I really have nothing much new to add. I agree that it is intriguing, draws me in, is a great premise and would benefit from a "less is more approach." My one additional comment is based on the story description and your mini-profile of the characters. "Deaf-mute" is an outdated term and is considered offensive by most in the Deaf community today. Simply Deaf is preferred. That said, as part of the Deaf community (a child of a Deaf adult) I am excited to see a Deaf character and very curious about how you will incorporate their Deafness in the story line.
1 like • 8d
@Zane Dowling Hmm... so this character doesn't communicate at all?
2.3 - Zane Dowling - The Unspoken
[Read the PDF in the Classroom Tab->Exposure Therapy->Lesson 2.0] ***Readability/Likability*** Please provide your feedback on the story's readability and likability in general. You can also add what you enjoyed most and/or what may have slowed you down while reading.
2 likes • 8d
I have found it very readable and likable and am looking forward to more.
2.2 - Zane Dowling - The Unspoken
[Read the PDF in the Classroom Tab->Exposure Therapy->Lesson 2.0] ***Writing Style*** Please provide your feedback on the story's writing style. This can pertain to prose, clarity, dialogue, or any elements worth mentioning.
2 likes • 8d
I agree with the others. It's a fun style and makes me want to read more, but possibly too many words.
1-4 of 4
Melinda Parry
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12points to level up
@melinda-parry-4639
I am an ordained Baptist minister and enjoy Sci-Fi and Fantasy. Let's connect!

Active 17m ago
Joined May 30, 2026
Wakefield, MA
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