There’s a question I want you to sit with for a moment: What if the thing that’s quietly wrecking your performance isn’t laziness, lack of discipline, or motivation… but doing too much? In this week’s video, I unpack something I’ve been noticing for years working with high achievers: people who are intelligent, capable, and outwardly successful often make decisions that actively work against them. Not because they don’t know better. But because they confuse activity with intelligence. From the outside, it looks like productivity. Ambition. Drive.From the inside, it often feels like burnout, frustration, and a constant sense that no matter how much you do, it’s never enough. The video explores the difference between intelligent decision-making and what I call compulsive achievement. One is about long-term quality of life. The other is about short-term relief, validation, and staying busy enough to avoid asking harder questions. A big part of the problem is that many high achievers tie their self-worth to outcomes. Results. Praise. Being seen as competent or impressive. When that happens, decisions stop being guided by values and start being driven by urgency, habit, and discomfort avoidance. You end up solving one problem while creating two more. You stay busy instead of effective. You push harder instead of stepping back. And you keep doing “the next thing” without ever stopping to ask whether it’s actually taking you where you want to go. In the video, I share some concrete examples of how this plays out in real life — in careers, leadership, relationships, health, and even parenting. I also talk about why many people are successful in spite of the way they make decisions, not because of it — and why that success often comes at a much higher cost than necessary. If you’ve ever felt like you’re ticking all the right boxes but still feeling off…If you’re achieving more and enjoying it less…Or if you’ve got a sense that you’re busy, but not aligned… This video will help you see why that’s happening — and why slowing down might actually be the most intelligent move you can make.

Welcome everyone to the Brojo Integrity Army community! Thank you all so much for joining. NEXT STEPS: 1) Please write a post introducing yourself - where you're from, what you're working on, and anything else you want people to know about you. 2) Have a look at the Nice Guy Recovery & Social Confidence course in the Classroom tab. 3) Check out the Membership Upgrade options to unlock the most valuable courses and coaching support. 4) Test out the Virtual Dan Coaching App to get specific support and guidance on your unique goals and issues (you'll be amazed at how much it sounds like Dan). ------ Some group rules to keep in mind: - No solicitation without my approval - do not offer your services or products as posts or private comments to other members - if someone does this, let me know immediately. This will result in a permanent ban. - Keep it respectful and try to help each other out. Disagreement is fine, abuse is not. - This page is exclusively about self-development, so discussions on unrelated topics (e.g. politics) will get deleted. - If anything in this group bothers you for whatever reason, please personally message me and I'll try to sort it out Thanks, and enjoy the community!! Dan

Most people assume that success and happiness go hand in hand. That once you’ve “made it” — the money, the title, the respect, the freedom — you’re supposed to feel calm, satisfied, and proud of yourself. But if you’re a high achiever, you probably already know that’s not how it actually works. In this video, I unpack a pattern I’ve seen over and over again since I started coaching high performers back in 2013: the more successful someone becomes by external standards, the more privately dissatisfied they often feel. CEOs, founders, executives, top performers — people everyone else looks up to — quietly struggling with anxiety, emptiness, imposter syndrome, and a constant sense that they’re never quite enough. I start by sharing the story of one of my clients, Lynn. From the outside, her life looks like a textbook success story. She came from a difficult background, used ambition as fuel, climbed the ladder relentlessly, and kept winning. More responsibility, more money, more opportunity. And yet internally, she feels like a fraud. She’s hyper-focused on her weaknesses, dismisses decades of achievement, and lives with the constant fear that she’ll be “found out.” If that sounds familiar, you’re not broken — you’re just running a system that backfires. One of the core ideas I explore is this strange psychological contradiction: achievement goes up, but fulfillment goes down. I use simple analogies to explain why chasing more actually creates more hunger, not satisfaction. Food, money, fitness, status — the pattern is the same. The more you chase, the more anxious and needy the system becomes. It’s not that you haven’t achieved enough. It’s that chasing itself creates the craving. We also look at why high achievers often become obsessed with the next win, the next milestone, the next finish line. There’s a deeply ingrained belief that “once I get there, I’ll finally relax.” But there is no there. The human brain doesn’t arrive at permanent satisfaction, and when your sense of worth is tied to outcomes you can’t fully control, you end up trapped in a cycle of pressure and self-criticism.