Would you consider a brother who allows his sisters to travel alone with a non-mahram driver a red flag? It threw me off when I found out about it, even though the family is "religious," but this made me uneasy. His father passed away a long time ago, and the girls are more than the guys, with only 3 brothers, 2 working, one in the city I live in and another in the city her family lives in and one studying who also lives in the same city. I am pretty sure they could've managed a way to ensure their safety. I found out that previously, two of the sisters also travelled alone. It has made me consider what I would expect as a treatment from such a potential because I would not be able to trust him or feel safe knowing this, nor in such situations. Is this supposed to be a hard boundary? It scared me because this is something I would naturally expect, but having heard this, I realise not everyone has this as a basic condition like me, especially considering it is not Islamically allowed for a woman to travel alone.

Asalamalaykum sisters, Has anyone used the match making app In Pairs? If so, could someone please share their experience about it? Thank you! 😊

Not every man understands the role of a wali. One sister shared, “The moment he respected my wali, I respected him more.” The right man won’t try to bypass your protection. He’ll honor it. Because a man who respects the process, respects you. How involved is your wali in your spouse search?🤍

So my five non negotiables are : 1. To be able to pursue a career and further studies if I want to. 2. That he has not been married before and is not looking for polygamy. 3. That he is Sunni & okay with my wearing of the niqab and to know what his view on it is. 4. Does not plan to move to the west. 5. Does not have any platonic relations with women nor does he shake hands(sudanese salaam). 6. Involves parents from the get go I am impressed I already combined some stuff together. My checklist is: 1. Attractive to me and I to him 2. Masjid prayer and jumuah 3. Alligned vision rooted in pleasing Allah 4. Practical steps towards vision (daily schedule, discipline, consistency, habit building and tracking, education, want to be a husband, son, sibling, relative and father that pleases his creator) 5. Physical stability 6. More emotionally intelligent and mature as well as psychologically mature to be the head of the family 7. Follows halal and haram of his gender (beard shaving, hijab, jumuah, lowering gaze, wearing gold and silk, riba, gambling, substance abuse and addictions, halal food) 8. Mental health awareness, internet addiction awareness (including how he manages both) 9. Parents must also agree to me marrying into the family 10. Daily effort to learn his deen 11. Separate housing 12. Living in the same city as mom This is what I came up with let me know if they need to be audited and need any additions.

I have never truly been in love, though I have experienced crushes and moments of infatuation at times. For a while, I used to feel embarrassed by that, almost as if it meant I lacked experience or had missed something important. But over time, I have begun to see it differently. Now I reframe it as something intentional and meaningful. By loving Allah first, I believe my romantic love and deepest emotional attachment are meant to be reserved for my future husband, in shaa Allah. To me, that love is not something casual or something to be given freely to just anyone — it is an amanah, something precious and worthy of protection. Instead of seeing my lack of romantic love as a deficiency, I now see it as a sign that my heart has been preserved for the right person, at the right time, in the way Allah has written for me. That perspective gives me peace rather than shame. Has anyone else felt the same way?