Why do I not have access to the other courses?

**Biggest insight:** that I STILL struggle with all-or-nothing/black-and-white thinking sometimes... **My open loop is:** this one paperwork thing I have been putting off, but interestingly I already did complete several other "open loops" I had been putting off (for ages) last week, after focusing on some inner healing work. **One word for how I feel right now:** capable

Hi, I'm Linda. I'm originally from Germany but living nomadically as a web and automations developer. I was late diagnosed at 40 last year and it's been such a positive change, so much finally makes sense! Most of my energy these days goes into figuring out why standard productivity systems never worked for me, and building ones that actually do. I love travelling, learning new hobbies (even though I already have way too many 😄), and nature/wildlife. Really looking forward to understanding more about myself and finding my people here 💛.

First thing first: Take a breath and please don't worry about this post, but do take note. (Sorry -- if that's the right word -- for the long, careful post. Skip to the fourth paragraph, if you wish.) Second: I am neither a Western Medical Doctor nor a Oriental Medical Doctor. (I am. however, a health professional; a person with a body, mind & energy; and someone who researches what he is curious about.) And I think this could be important for your health. In the powerful class about how to love ourselves before and after sleep time, Jim expressed an appropriate, healthy respect toward the idea of changing energy with a cold shower, or at least a 30 second finish to a warm one. He accurately said it may not be for everyone. The helpful sheet on this that I now use daily, before and after bed, is compact and doesn't present those cautions. Western research agrees with the benefits. Western and Eastern approaches both say we may need to do it carefully or even give it a pass. In the West there is data that for some people, a cold plunge/shower can be dangerous for their health (and for others, not). I'm more familiar with the Eastern view. There, it's said that intense coldness can cause serious health crashes (non-tech term), especially, again, for certain health profiles. This is especially true for people who have "Kidney Meridian" imbalances, especially "Kidney Yang Deficiency" (which I have). In this hallowed healthcare, "Kidney" is associated partially with those organs, plus bladder, and also with: the entire nervous system; rest, exhaustion and overwhelm; the emotion, fear; low back pain; knee pain; bones and teeth; inner quiet and its lack, hearing; urination; sexuality; our will; and our fundamental life energy. Considering that list, I though that, as a population, ADHDers might be more prone than neuro-typical folks to these imbalances. And "Oriental MD A.I." fully and avidly agrees, and offers the specific reasons. I hesitated to say this. My inner critic used to imagine that heeding my great aversion to an otherwise therapeutic intense chill suggests that I may just be resistant and I should just do it. (I mean, I've walked on fire!) And I wouldn't want to dissuade anyone unnecessarily from the potential benefits.

The mask I've been wearing most: Some combination of perfectionist, caretaker, and invisible. How exhausting it's been: I don't mind being the strong one, the bigger person, patiently comforting and supporting others...but there are times in life that can be hard, and at those times especially I need to be heard and comforted, too. What I loved as a kid (before the masks): - playing outside and riding bikes - reading books - writing books - climbing trees - baking and sewing and knitting and other domestic skills - drawing and painting and paper art - creative performing arts Friction Audit complete, this are the exact steps i have to take: Find all the papers pertaining to "x."