I didn’t really have much to post this week, but I’ve been noticing something. As parents, we all want to react better. Teach better. Lead better. But I’ve realized something uncomfortable about myself. The moments when I get the most frustrated with my son are often the moments when he’s struggling with something I struggled with. Sometimes it’s big things like emotional regulation or impulse control. Sometimes it’s small things like a motor skill or learning something new. For a long time, I think I labeled those as “weaknesses” I would see in myself. But that’s not actually true. They aren’t weaknesses. I’ve grown through those things. I’ve built systems. I’ve matured. I function well. If they were truly weaknesses, I would still be stuck there. What they really are…are insecurities. Old ones. When I see him struggle, it taps into a younger version of me that remembers being behind, or being corrected, or feeling embarrassed, or feeling out of control. And that’s when I get the most cross. Not when he’s in danger. Not when it’s about health or safety. Those moments are clear and protective. It’s when my own unresolved stuff resurfaces. That’s the part I have to own. Because if I’m not careful, I won’t be correcting his behavior. I’ll be reacting to my past...and that’s not fair to him. So the lesson for me right now is this: Before I correct him, I need to check myself. Is this about his growth or is this about my old wounds? If it’s the second one, that’s my work to do. Not his. I’m curious if anyone else has noticed this in themselves.

Anyone else feel like being a father is a proud title you earn after you pass your genes to another generation. All while fulfilling a natural position as a man. …while being a is about getting regularly disrespected by a tiny human who you just want to get dressed for the day? 🤣🤣🤣

Lately, my son and I have been doing something simple every morning. After breakfast, we set a five minute timer and we “be gorillas.” That’s it. Gorilla time. It started as basic roughhousing and nonverbal play. Chest pounding, crawling around, making ridiculous noises. The kind of physical father son play every study says is good for kids. But it’s become more than that. Sometimes we stay in full gorilla mode. Sometimes we’re gorillas while listening to his Toniebox. Sometimes we’re gorillas who count. Sometimes it’s just exercise and eye contact and figuring each other out without words. A few things I’ve noticed about it: We set a timer. When the timer goes off, we’re done. That structure matters. It’s teaching him that activities have boundaries and that transitions are part of life. It’s his choice. I don’t bring it up. If he wants gorilla time, he asks for it. If he loses interest halfway through, the timer keeps running and we move on when it ends. I don’t chase him to re-engage. He’s starting to learn that if something matters to him, he has to prioritize it. There’s physical play, which builds connection. There’s nonverbal communication, which we’re still working on. There’s structure. There’s agency. And it’s five minutes. I love movies. Sharing a film with him feels special. But if I’m honest, there have been plenty of times we’ve just vegged on the couch. That’s not really connection. That’s proximity. Gorilla time feels different. It’s intentional. It’s active. It’s ours. I don’t think everyone needs to “be gorillas.” But I do think every dad should have something small, repeatable, and special that belongs just to them and their kid. Even five minutes can mean something. What’s your version of gorilla time?

How do you handle disciplining your kids? I know there’s a wide age range in this group but if there a certain point, we all need to tell our kids had a behave. Anybody have any tricks for keeping their cool in these situations?

...I don’t fully know what’s next. I don’t know exactly what this group is going to become. I don’t know what the “final form” looks like yet. And it would be easy to label that as being lost. But honestly? I don’t feel lost in a bad way. I feel like I’m choosing my next move. One thing I do know, across improv, business, work, and fatherhood, is that everything keeps coming back to the same question: What game am I playing right now? As fathers, I think we get tripped up when we’re juggling multiple games at once and forget to name which one matters most in the moment. Provider. Partner. Leader. Playmate. Student. Builder. Sometimes we’re exhausted not because we’re failing but because we’re switching games without realizing it. This past week drove that home for me. Big wins at work. Real learning moments as a dad. Some situations that required instinct, restraint, and humility. The kind of stuff you don’t get a manual for. And that’s part of why I’m grateful this space exists; even if it’s still evolving. Sometimes it’s a place to think things through. Sometimes it’s a place to rant. Sometimes it’s just a place to drop a dumb meme and breathe for a second. I don’t have all the answers yet but I am here. And I want this to be a space where you feel like you can be too. Which brings me to something I want your help with. A group can exist and be “nice”… but for it to really matter, there has to be something you’re moving toward. Some kind of transformation, engagement, or intrigue that makes you want to show up, not out of obligation, but because it actually helps. So I’ll ask you directly: What would need to change in your life for this group to be worth participating in? What do you want more clarity on? What game are you trying to play better right now? Drop a comment. One sentence is enough. I’m listening because I want to build this with you, not just for you.