My Story — and Why I Am Who I Am Today I grew up in a small village, a free, carefree child—always in the forest, between fields, and up in fruit trees. I loved discovering, observing, and losing myself in nature.I was raised in a Christian family, prayed regularly, and spoke to God. Home was warm and loving. Part of my childhood unfolded at medieval fairs, with cannons, fire kitchens, and a great sense of freedom. I was allowed to be among the adults—listening, learning, trying out crafts. There was singing, dancing, and playing with fire—there I felt freer than anywhere else. When I was seven, a very close friend died. In that moment, the world I had known was shaken. Panic attacks and deep fears became constant companions. My body trembled, my heart raced, and I felt as if I might die at any moment.The illusion of control crumbled. I understood: life ends—sometimes much sooner than we think. Children die, too. This certainty did something to me that I could no longer push away. I tried to ignore the fear. During the day, play and bustle distracted me. At night, alone in bed, it returned—the fear of death. My mother did her best, yet I felt her worry and helplessness. So I kept my fears more and more to myself. I began asking God questions: Who are you? Are you there? Do you protect me? I asked because I knew no other way.From the fear grew psychological strain, self-doubt, and resignation. I withdrew and spent much of my childhood and youth alone. With the onset of puberty came a phase of inner numbness. I cried a lot, felt unloved, and was convinced I would always be alone.When I started my vocational training, a new environment brought the chance for a fresh start. I found friendships, joy in life, and could finally be who I truly was again. In the course of that, I visited a place called Taizé, which fundamentally changed my view of religion and faith. That time was full of self-reflection and personal development, which deeply influenced my growth.

The last few days were a blessing. We lived in nature and connected with our roots. People went through deep processes. What healing.