I have these dreams Of us coming together by the masses It's it's in nature trees every where With these white barracks like structures it feels like summer camp

My healing journey began very early, shaped by experiences I didn’t yet have language for. As the youngest in a large family, I learned to sense and adapt, often feeling more than I could explain. Even then, my body carried stories—of sensitivity, resilience, and a deep inner world that was quietly forming. As an adult, I felt called to Colorado, a place that became both expansive and challenging for me. It was there that I met someone who would later be understood as a twin-flame catalyst. That connection stirred my heart and spirit in ways I didn’t yet understand, opening layers of awareness that would continue to unfold long after our paths separated. Not long after, Cynthia came into my life as a spiritual teacher and trusted friend. Her presence offered steadiness during a time when I was learning how to make sense of my inner experiences. She helped me see that awareness itself could be healing, even when the path felt uncertain. There were periods of deep darkness and disorientation, including hospital stays, when my inner world felt overwhelming. Looking back, I see these seasons not as failures, but as moments when unprocessed pain was asking to be seen and integrated. Healing during this time was slow, physical, and often quiet—learning how to feel safely in my body again. Over time, my relationship with healing changed. It became less about pushing through and more about listening. I began working gently with my nervous system, allowing emotions to move at their own pace, and meeting my shadow with compassion rather than fear. Awareness became a place of rest. Eventually, I found my way to the Crystal Chamber Master Healers Galactic Academy, studying with Hillary Faye. This experience felt grounding and affirming, bringing together my lived experience and my devotion to healing in a way that felt embodied and true. I continue to walk this path with humility, patience, and trust in the body’s wisdom and the soul’s timing. It feels meaningful to be here, listening, learning, and walking alongside this community.

I didn’t have the money to be able to afford all the spiritual things like yoga classes, spiritual retreats, gurus, teachers, spiritual healers, psychic readers,. books, rocks, ritual funk etc,... I had to go within for all that those things represent. Become my own reader, healer, guide, guru and teacher to become the energies of all those objects others use to be it. it was there that I learned that everything is already within me. I didn't need all that to be spiritual. I just needed Spirit ♥️

I’ve been thinking lately about the tools I use for self-development, the main one being “the triggers are the guides.’ and working relentlessly to notice when I’m upset about something, either because I’m afraid it might be true or because part of me knows it’s true, and I’d rather avoid it. The inverse of delayed gratification is immediate pain. Pull the bandaid off. Get to the root of it. Dive right in to the hard stuff as soon as possible to get it dealt with so it’s not a background noise dragging everything else down. Taking this route to work through my “buttons” that others can push to get a rise out of me, I’ve noticed some things. When you’re triggered, don’t put too much meaning into the other person’s meaning. By that I mean, you being triggered doesn’t necessarily mean what was said about you is “correct.” It doesn’t mean it’s not correct either. It’s actually kind of irrelevant either way because the trigger itself, the feeling within your body, is the actual guide, not the surface level intellectualizing. Why is that important? Because our intellect wants us to keep the Shadow buried and focus on the other person instead of ourselves, our bodies, and what’s taking place within us right now. If we can invalidate the content of what is being said, we can create stories where we’ve been wronged or victimized or misinterpreted, etc. All of those things may be “true”, but in that moment your rational brain isn’t firing on all cylinders. If you don’t let the energy rising up within you guide you to your own fear and avoidance, then you are missing an opportunity to develop and improve the quality of your consciousness. Later, after you are well regulated, you can connect with aspects of the truth or lack of truth from a logic perspective and take proper steps to create, communicate, and enforce healthy boundaries, but that doesn’t happen when you are triggered. When you are triggered, you may hear words and interpret intentions and experience things that aren’t actually happening in that moment. They are actually the body reminding you of the scar.. Things which have been left unprocessed that are seething right beneath the surface, desperate to be known, seen, and released. It could be stuff from childhood, making the content of the current circumstances mostly irrelevant, in spite of what your intellect is screaming at you.

Living in your truth changes everything, not because the world suddenly becomes easier, but because you stop fighting yourself. There’s a deep relief that comes from no longer editing your soul to be more digestible. Inner peace doesn’t come from having a perfect life, it comes from finally standing in alignment with who you actually are. Healing is the gateway to authenticity. You can’t fully be yourself while you’re still carrying wounds that taught you to shrink, mask, or survive. As you heal, you stop apologizing for your existence, you stop asking for permission to take up space. You realize that the parts of you that were once labeled “too much” or “not enough” were never the problem. They were signals pointing you back home.Authenticity also requires forgiveness. Forgiving yourself for the choices you made when you were doing the best you could with what you knew then. You don’t heal by shaming your past. You heal by integrating it, honoring it, and letting it refine you. That’s how you step into your light, not by erasing your shadows, but by understanding them and acknowledging the lessons and growth they brought you. Here’s the quiet miracle. When you live unapologetically as yourself, you stop chasing connection and stop performing to be accepted. The people who resonate with your frequency find you naturally. Your soul tribe doesn’t need you to perform. They recognize you by your energy. Life is already complicated enough without turning it into a daily theater production. You weren’t born to play a role, you were born to be real.Self love is the foundation of all of this. The steady, grounded choice to treat yourself with honesty, compassion, and respect. When you love yourself, authenticity stops being scary. You’re no longer afraid of being seen, because you’re no longer at war with who you see in the mirror. Be yourself. Fully. The world doesn’t need another version of someone else. It needs you, exactly as you are. ♥️