Nov 13 • 😊General discussion
Becoming My Own Permission Slip
For most of my life, I worried way too much about what other people thought of me.
I tried to be the “right” version of myself in every situation — kind, capable, easy to understand, everyone's 'go to' gal. But fairly recently, I realized I didn’t need anyone else’s permission to live how I want to live.
These days, I’m choosing self-care over approval. I’m learning to ask, “What do I need?” before wondering “What will they think?”
It’s such a relief to give myself the permission I was waiting for all along. (that I really didn't need)
This made me laugh and here's why...in reflecting on this I went down the path of the 12 step programs, and I wondered what a 12 step program would look like for people pleasers. This is all tongue in cheek and hopefully not disrespectful.( )
Step 1: Admit I am powerless over everyone’s opinions—and that my peace has become unmanageable.
Step 2: Believe that maybe not everyone has to like me (and I’ll survive).
Step 3: Make a decision to turn my energy over to things that actually matter.
Step 4: Make a fearless inventory of all the times I said “yes” when I meant “absolutely not.”
Step 5: Admit to myself (and maybe a friend) that I can’t be everyone’s emotional customer service rep.
Step 6: Become entirely ready to stop apologizing for existing.
Step 7: Humbly ask the universe to delete “Does this make you mad at me?” from my vocabulary.
Step 8: Make a list of people I've tried to please—and forgive them and myself.
Step 9: Practice saying “no” without a 10-minute explanation (and maybe even with a smile).
Step 10: Continue to check in with mysef, and when I've overcommitted, promptly back out with grace.
Step 11: Seek through journaling, tea, meditation, and quiet moments to know what I actually want.
Step 12: Having experienced newfound peace, share this freedom with other recovering people-pleasers — but only if they asked first.
Which step are you on today?😁❤️
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Becoming My Own Permission Slip
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